Sydney & Denny

Sydney & Denny
September at the Park

Friday, December 31, 2010

That time of year.

We all reflect.
Well, here we are again. New Year's Eve. It comes along every year, and every year I think we all have the tendency to look back on the soon to be completed year. I think it's only human nature. The calendar just happens to be a convenient time to look back on our good and bad times. We probably all vow to make the next year better than the last. With that said, I'd like to present to you something a little unique(at least in my mind.)
Dear Me of one year from now,
I want to write this to you to let you know that things are pretty good right now. I'm sure you will look back on the coming year and wish you had done some things differently, but that's okay. You do it every year, but you know that because you're me right? I just want to put this out there so that when this time next year rolls around, you will know EXACTLY what you were thinking.
I really hope that you enjoyed becoming an uncle again as Krista is about to pop at any moment. She's having a boy, and while I haven't been able to get as excited about it as I'd like, it's a really cool thing. She seems a bit overwhelmed at the moment, but I'm sure that will pass for her. I hope you do everything in your power to help her through this. You know what it's like to have a second child and the challenges that brings. If nothing else, just be there for a phone call if she needs. Be a good uncle and a better brother.
I really hope that you take the time to learn to be more patient with Sydney and Denny. You have been doing SO much better at that, just continue to improve. Being a great parent is the most important job you have ever, or will ever, had. Try and improve EVERY day. I hope that when you look back on the year, that is just about the biggest accomplishment that you have.
Continue to treat Stacy like the Queen that she is. She has been the most amazing wife and mother in the world. I hope that you can look back on the year and know that you've taken care of her the way she deserves. 
I truly hope that you can say that the family issue that is going on right now is in your past. I really hope that you and K have resolved all the issues between the two of  you, and the family can be as close as it once was. There is nothing more important than family, and the strain that the tension has caused is just not necessary. 
I hope that you have put your heart and soul into this blog, as well as the second blog about sports that you want to start. Give blogging your best effort, it's fun and therapeutic at the same time.
I hope that you have gone out of your way to find a way to get back into college so that at some point in the next few years you can realize your one real professional dream. To teach and coach at the high school level.
I hope that you found a way to take care of this health issue that is hounding you right now. I hope that you have it diagnosed properly and gotten the proper care so that you can find a way to get active again. Sitting in an easy chair is not getting it done. Please tell me you've gotten off your ass and done something active!
 Please tell me that you have worked hard with Stacy to find a way to move towards home ownership. It's a dream that we both have and it's going to be a challenge. Just tell me that you've worked hard at it because it means A LOT to her. Make her happy.
And last, but not least, tell me that you have continued to be happy the whole year. Be happy for your wife and kids. Be happy for your extended family. Be happy for yourself, and you will make everyone around you a little happier.
With that, I say Happy New Year. Go out and make it a great one.
Thank you.
Now to you my reader, I hope that you have a great New Year and that you make this year all that you hope it to be. I would also like to thank you for reading my rants the last few months and I hope that we can continue this writer/reader relationship long into the future.
Happy New Year!!!  

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Our Christmas Tree!


How long does it stay up?
I've been thinking about this for a few days, and I've wondered what the protocol is. My wife is in charge of the Christmas tree in our house, and her attitude towards it changes based on when it is in the month of December. Usually, when we get home from Thanksgiving dinner she is ready to put that baby up. She gets all excited and wants to decorate the crap out of our house. I really have no problem with that, except there is just something inside me that thinks Christmas trees shouldn't be up until at least December 1st. Of course now we have kids, and their happiness is what matters most. Oh, and my wife's also!
Like I said though, Stacy is in charge of putting the tree up anyway so what do I care? I help as much as I'm allowed to, but really that's not much other than putting my favorite ornaments on the tree. I get to lift the kids(as much as I physically can anymore at least) up to put stuff towards the top. I get to give my opinion on where the tree should be each year. And then I get told how my opinion of where the tree goes is the wrong opinion. So, I just let her do her thing and stay out of her way. Usually no later than December 1st the tree goes up and always looks amazing.
Then...
So, as we all know, Christmas eventually rolls around. The tree has been up for a while and this year we have had to get after the boy to LEAVE THE DAMN ORNAMENTS ON THE TREE!!! I can't wait until next year when he's a year taller and can get to everything on the tree! Should be fun. Anyway, Christmas comes and goes just like it does every year, and usually about 9pm on Christmas night Stacy is "over" the tree being up. Again, it doesn't really matter much to me because Stacy does most(all) of the work taking it down. I think that trees should come down soon after Christmas if my opinion matters. Unfortunately it doesn't. At least Stacy and I agree that you don't need to be those people that leave their Christmas trees up until February! Here we are less than two days until New Years, and as I drive along I see houses with trees still up and glowing in the windows. Now, I'm not a peeping tom looking into people's windows, I just notice things. I really think that trees should be down by now don't you? Christmas is over, let it go. I understand people who really love Christmas, because I am one of them, but come on. Take your tree down and enjoy the New Year!
What are your thoughts on this subject? Personally, we took ours down so our son would STOP MESSING WITH THE DAMN ORNAMENTS! What are your reasons for taking your tree down when you do? Do you still have yours up? Let me know if I'm the crazy guy.
Hope you have had a great Holiday season, and that you have your tree down! 

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

The case of the missing Rudolph ornament!

Things seem to disappear in our house!
Today was a fun day! Stacy was off of work, and Sydney is now on Christmas break. So, we got to spend the entire day together as a family. We had a lot of fun, and actually everyone got to get a little rest. That extra rest should come in handy with Christmas coming up soon. I'm sure naps won't be tops on the priority list for the kids. So, all in all, a really good day. Except, something came up missing. I suspect that our house is a lot like many homes that contain children, and that often things disappear. Socks, shoes, hat, mittens, remote controls, cell phones, my keys, Denny, all things that come up missing in our house. And today was no different.
  The picture above is presented as evidence in the Case of the missing Rudolph ornament!
The timeline.
At approximately 10:30am this morning, Stacy noticed that our Rudolph ornament was not on the tree for some reason. The search commenced from there. We asked Denny if he had taken the ornament from the tree, and of course he denied it. Then later changed his story to "YES!" when he was asked a second time. I think he just likes saying "yes" though. So, he was asked where he put it, but he was not breaking. He refused to tell us what he had done with it. Or, he was just not capable of telling us, it doesn't really matter because we were getting nowhere in our search. So, I decided that maybe Denny wasn't our ONLY suspect in the case. I compiled a photo list of our two most likely suspects. They are:
   This crazy guy. Denny! You can just tell by looking at him that he is always up to something. Plus, he's trying to hide in a box!
                                          And,
This hyper little dog! He's always chewing on things he's not supposed to. I suspect that they may have worked in tandem, or separately on the same crime. I believe that it is possible for Denny to have removed said ornament and then in his two year old haste, dropped it. At that point it is possible that Rocket picked it up and chewed it "all to Hell." That is just my first theory and the one I'm working off of.

The break we needed!
I was having a hard time during our search for a couple of reasons. First, my morning stiffness from whatever it is that I have going on(RA or something else that hurts a lot,) had not worn off yet. Secondly, because Sydney would not stop whining and crying about Rudolph being her favorite ornament ever. And, "I love that Rudolph, how could Denny do this to my life?" I was getting more frustrated with this case by the minute. I kicked some thoughts around in my head to no avail. I had folded a load of clothes during the day yesterday and had left them in the basket in our living room so I thought maybe Denny had put Rudolph in there. Then I remembered that I had folded the clothes after the kids had went to bed. So, I was taking a break. I needed to put my contacts in any way. Once up stairs I thought I'd give a quick look just to be on the safe side. Under the beds? Nope. In the bathroom? Nope. Under the dressers? Nope. Where could Rudolph be? If only he would flash his red nose and lead me to him. Then it hit me like a bolt of lightning. I had folded a different set of clothes earlier in the day and that basket also sat in the living room for a while yesterday. (Yes, I often will do all of our laundry and leave it in baskets rather than actually putting it away like I should. Stop judging me!) I took a peek into that basket that was sitting on the hope chest in our room, and there it was. Rudolph had been found! Along with two other ornaments that we didn't even know were missing. But, the other ornaments were not the point. I was going to be a hero to Sydney!!! I took Rudolph down and gave him to her and you should have seen the smile. It was like I had found the actual Rudolph for her. About ten minutes later she came up to me out of nowhere and gave me a huge hug and said "Thank you for finding my Rudolph Daddy." That's one heck of a way to get Christmas rolling if you ask me.
I'm a regular Encyclopedia Brown or something!
I should have been a detective or a Hardy Boy or something because the way I thought this case through, I've got skills. Now if I could just find the wallet I lost this past summer!  

Monday, December 20, 2010

What were they thinking?

I'm going to start studying genealogy!
I've decided that I want to know more about where I come from. I think it's important that we all know where we come from. If you don't know where you've been, you'll never get where you're going. Isn't that some sort of famous phrase of some kind? Well, my point is that I would really like to know more about my ancestors, and those of my wife. I'd like to know the names of the people that I am descended from. I'd like to know what they did to survive, how they made a living, what they did for recreation. I know that genealogy is the study of this sort of thing, so I'm looking into taking a class or two on the subject. Just enough to learn what to do, and where to go in order to do this type of research. I really feel like I need to know this stuff to understand something I'm dieing to know.
Once I know who they were!
So, once I take the aforementioned classes, and learn about genealogy, and find out who my ancestors were, what do I use that information for? I mean really how is knowing this information going to do me any good? Well, I'll tell you, I have this plan. I'm going to get together with some really smart physicist type of people and make them my really good friends. I'm going to get them drunk one night and convince them that we CAN build a time machine. I'm going to get these really smart guys to really believe that time travel is possible. If you read my blog, you will remember that I did a post about time travel before. If not you can read it here.  I don't really know if time travel is possible, but I know that there are people a lot smarter than me out there that with the right encouragement can be made to believe that they can make it possible.  Well, after they build me my time machine, I'm going to travel back in time and meet all the people that are my ancestors. I mean WAY back. All the way back to when North America was settled. I want to meet the people that I'm related to when they first settled here in this part of the country.
Why meet them?
Well, I'd like to meet these people and ask them a question. I'd like to look them in the eye and ask them if they are as freaking stupid as I think they are! Think about it for a second. If you lived back in that time and had really no insulation, no furnace, not much in terms of warm clothes, and your floor was probably the ground. Why in the Blue Hell do you settle in this part of the country??? It's damn cold out here in Michigan, and there is no reason to live here when you don't have to. If I was alive back in the 1700's and I came to America, I'd ask to be dropped down by Florida. Yeah, there are other weather issues down there, but you wouldn't have to live four months of the year trying to just stay warm as my number one priority of the day. So, now after I time travel back there and meet my ancestors, I'm going to punch them square in the face!!! There's about 8 inches of snow on the ground here, and it's so cold you can smell it when you walk outside. I know Minnesota has it worse, but I still hate this crap. When you have problems with arthritis, the cold sucks! So, to my ancestors I say thanks so much! You idiots!

Friday, December 17, 2010

My son won't take a nap!

He watched me from my bedroom window!!!
So yesterday my wife was off from work, which was nice. It gave us a little time to hang out together and get some things done. We have been wanting to get in the basement and reorganize some stuff, and we finally were making the time to do it. The whole family took Sydney to school and afterward Stacy, Denny and I returned home. We took Denny upstairs and put him down for his nap, and we went down to the basement. We have a monitor that we can hear what is going on in their room with, and we took it to the basement with us. We thought he was going to be really tired as he had gotten up EARLY in the morning. I'm talking before the rooster early! He has a tendency to do that from time to time. So, we thought we were going to have the time to just get down there and get the work we needed to do done. That was really dumb of us. From the monitor we could hear him messing around up in his bedroom. He has recently taken to getting out of his bed and playing in the closets. He has been told repeatedly to not do that, but like that really matters right? Well, we hollered up to him to get in bed, and he listened. Sort of. He would go running into his bed, but a few minutes later we would hear him get up, and start causing some other form of chaos. Well, we just let him do his thing, thinking he would eventually tire himself out to the point that he'd fall down from exhaustion. Nope! It got time for me to leave to get Sydney and as I walked out to the van, I took a bag of garbage to the dumpster. I could hear him banging on Stacy and my bedroom window yelling "DaDa, DaDa, Bye!" He watched me the entire time! What a little shit!
I had to report him!
Well, I just can't let that slide. I got on my phone and called Stacy to let her know what he was up to. By the time she answered, he was downstairs and had the door opened and was waving to me through the storm door. This is about an hour and a half after he had been originally put down for his "nap." We think that he's so used to it just being me and him at home during the day that when he saw me leave, he panicked. Thinking I was leaving him there all alone! I've often thought about doing that. Of course I am joking, kind of. 
Well, this just illustrates a problem we have been having with him lately. He won't stay in his bed for his nap. I will put him up there and tell him "Now don't you get up. You are up here to sleep. You stay in bed, PLEASE!" Never works. I'll hear him messing around before I get to the bottom of the steps. I usually let him play for a bit before I yell up to him to please get in bed. Eventually he always falls asleep. Sometimes it's an hour after originally putting him up there, sometimes longer. I don't have a problem with him playing up there before going to sleep. The problem is what he does while he is "playing." 
It's like he's the Tasmanian Devil!
I usually go upstairs and find a mess the likes of which are unmatched by any normal human children. I've stated before that I think he's from another planet, and I think this is just another point towards that. I'll find at least two books that he has ripped the pages out of. Good thing we have EVERY SINGLE CHILDREN'S BOOK EVER WRITTEN in our house. That way we have plenty more for him to rip up tomorrow! I've found clothes from both the kid's closet and ours, thrown about the floor. Once, I found three or four picture albums thrown on the floor(they were on a higher shelf in our closet.) They weren't really important pictures though. Just our wedding album, and the births of both kids. So you know it was really no big deal that he had pulled pictures out of each album. I often find the ENTIRE ROLL OF TOILET PAPER unrolled and strewn throughout the upstairs like he was TPing our house. Sometimes he has on an entirely different outfit  than what he was wearing when I put him up there. Sometimes, he's just naked. I once found him sleeping halfway under his sister's bed!
So, what I'm saying is, we have a problem! I close the three doors that are upstairs. The bathroom, the hall closet, and our bedroom. None of which have locks. Even though I'm not sure locks are a problem for him. The closets have sliding doors, and I am not sure I've seen baby locks for those type of doors, but as I said, he would figure out how to open them. I can't sit upstairs while he's up there, because he will know I'm up there and want to play with me. He needs a nap though. Without one he acts like he did tonight. A SCREAMING, CRANKY, OUT OF CONTROL LUNATIC!  Somebody please help me. Please tell me that one of my readers out there knows some magical secret to keeping him in bed. I've had people tell me to give him cough syrup to make him sleepy, but I'm just not that guy. So, I am going to put my faith in the blog world that someone out there knows how to solve this problem. You guys have helped me with so many other topics before, I know you won't let me down this time. And, if you don't have the answer, but think someone you know does, please pass this on to them. Not only could I use the help with this issue, but I could always use another reader.
   
I know you're thinking he doesn't look that crazy, but trust me. This is the poster child for crazy children everywhere. The thing is, I love this kid more than I could ever describe and I don't want to change a single thing about him. I just want him to not do things that could maybe hurt himself. Like pissing Daddy off to the point of NO RETURN!
Thanks again, and have another great day.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

We had a third child today.

It was like my kids had never seen a baby before.
Today a coworker of my wife's called and asked if she could babysit for her little girl. Since Stacy was off work today, we said fine. The little girl was one year old. Today! It was her first birthday. I felt really bad that her mom had to work on her first birthday, so we tried to make it a really good day for her. But, my kids kind of scared the crap out of the poor little girl. They were both right up on top of her all day. I mean RIGHT UP ON TOP OF HER!!! Denny kept saying "Baby, Baby, Baby." He was so excited to see the baby. At least he's kind of talking now right? Sydney was trying so hard to be a good helper, and for the most part she was, but she was a little over the top as well. It really was like they had never seen a baby before. I think they were really excited about having someone else in the house, but WOW!
I'm at my limit!
Well, we had this little girl here, and it really made me absolutely, positively sure that I do not want anymore kids. The little girl didn't do anything to cause that. It's just that I realized that two is my limit in kids I can take care of at once. I don't know how those of you who have three or more do it. At least Stacy was home to help. In fact, she did most of the "work" when it came to the baby. The little girl wouldn't let Stacy put her down most of the day. We kind of figured out that she was scared of Denny. I mean when she screamed anytime he came near her was our first clue. I know he was just trying to enjoy the baby, but he was particularly crazy today. Like I said though, it made me know that I can't handle more than what I have now. Denny is such a handful that for us that adding a third child into the mix would be disastrous. Plus, Denny as the proverbial middle child? No thank you. So, this was a good thing today. The kids got to have another kid around to drive crazy. I got to get to that place where I'm 100% sure I'm done with making babies. Plus, Stacy even told me that while she really enjoyed having a baby in her arms, she was sure she didn't want anymore as well. Just seeing how our kids reacted was enough. Now, I know if we had one of our own, the excitement would wear off, but...
Never try to predict what our kids will do.
I learned something recently. My kids are so unpredictable. Just when I think I have them figured out, they surprise me. When I think they will be hard to handle in a public setting, they act like perfect children. When I think they will be hungry, they turn up their noses at any food. When I think they will be tired, they run nonstop until they finally drop. I just don't know what to think sometimes. I think that's what is so great about being a parent. Not knowing what will come next. It also scares the living crap right out of me! What are they going to be like as teenagers? Holy crap! I think I know what their personalities are going to be like, but like I said, I should never try to predict what they will do. It should be fun.
Issues.
I mentioned in a recent post that I have some family issues going on. Well, I just want to say that I'm not going to say anything else about it here except that I hate that it has happened the way that it has. It's been really hard for a while now, and it's only going to get worse. I really feel bad that things have gotten to this point, and while I feel as if I've done nothing wrong in this situation, I realize it takes two parties to have a disagreement. Someday I hope to fill you in that everything has been resolved and the family situation is good again. And, I'd like to thank all of you who have commented on the situation. Your advise is greatly appreciated.
With that, I'm done for the day. I hope you have another great day!
     

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Am I doing the right thing?

Questioning my choice.
So events transpired today that have made me question weather I am doing the right thing with this whole SAHD thing. Have I made the right choice? Should I be out there working two jobs to support my family, not getting to see them ever? Should I have continued working at a job I hated, and that I was becoming increasingly unable to do due to my deteriorating health? I mean the fact is, I wouldn't be able to do my most recent job right now. If I had had to go into that store and do my normal duties, I would have been sent home due to not being able to do what was expected of me. My hands, hips, knees, wrists, elbows and shoulders were all gripped with pain for most of the day. Yet, I still ask myself if maybe I'm going about this the wrong way. Every day that my wife goes to work, I feel like it should be me leaving. I should be out there supporting my family. 
Issues for most SAHDs.
I have done quite a bit of reading about being a SAHD and a lot of times I read where SAHDs have this same issue that I do. I sometimes feel like less of a man because I stay at home, and my wife works. It doesn't help that I am not very mechanical, and my wife is. She is the one who fixes things, or puts things together in our house. So yeah, I question my manhood at times. I've got to believe that I'm not the only guy staying at home that does this right? Or, am I the freak?
Then I remember.
After I have those moments where I question my own manhood, I realize that there is really no set definition of manhood. I think a man does what he has to that is best for his family. My wife and I came the the decision for me to stay home together. We decided that it was better for us financially, better for my health, and better for our kids if I stayed home. I have to set these feelings that come up from time to time aside, and do what is now my job. I have to take care of my kids by providing for them here at home. I have to feed them(when they will actually eat) bath them, teach them manners, teach them right from wrong, play with them, referee their fights, and be the best father I know how. That's what I have to do, and it's what I'm going to continue to do no matter what some people might say. And, I'm going to do it better tomorrow than I did today. Every day.
I'm huge in Toledo!
I started this little blog about three months ago with the goal of using it as stress relief and possibly getting paid a little money some day. I knew that I would have to work hard to grow this blog to one that would be worthy of being paid for. I still have a LONG way to go to get to that point. It does appear that I have found a foothold in Toledo, Ohio though. Apparently there are people there that read my blog, and that makes me very happy. There are so many wonderful people in Toledo, and I truly loved living there for six years. It's a beautiful city and I encourage you to visit if you have never been there. If you get the chance, and like great food, take the time to visit JAlexanders on Talmadge Rd. It is amazing. I've went there a number of times with my wife, and sometimes with her family, and we have always had an amazing meal. 
So, I thank those of you in Toledo who are reading my blog and ask that you continue to do so. Maybe pass on the links to others so they too can enjoy my rants on being a SAHD!
With that, have a great night.       

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Holidays with the Inlaws!

It's always fun!
So, I just got home earlier from an evening with my wife's side of the family. It was designated as a Christmas party, and even Santa visited. Now from the heading of this paragraph you may see some implied sarcasm. Well, there is a little of that, but for the most part, I always have a decent time with Stacy's side of the family. There are a lot of people that I really enjoy talking with and hanging out with. Stacy has a bunch of cousins that are close in age to us, and they all have kids, so there is always something to talk about with them. Then of course there is my mother-in-law. 
I'm not her favorite person!
Well, let's just say that there is tension when her and I are around each other. I'm not sure why. When I first met Stacy, I was the greatest guy in the world. My mother-in-law(from here forward she will be referred to as K) thought I was just swell for coming along and making her daughter happy. Then about the time Stacy got pregnant the first time, something changed. Now, I'm a piece of crap. I've mentioned that I am experiencing some physical problems that I think is Rheumatoid Arthritis here a few times. When I was feeling the worst, I was at K's house for the day and could barely walk or move. For the next couple of weeks when Stacy would talk to K on the phone, you would think she would at least be curious about what was going on with me, but no. Not even a single question about my problem. I don't think she cares. And that's fine. For a few years now she has made little snide comments digging at Stacy and particularly me. She gives me these looks and roll her eyes at me letting me know her displeasure for me without saying anything. That's all well and good, I've gotten to a point where I don't really care about that crap anymore. She can hate my guts for all I care. But, there's one thing she does consistently that I am going to put a stop to!
Undermining my authority!
Well, K pulled her crap again tonight. We walked in to the party and Santa was in the middle of speaking with all of the children in attendance. Both of my kids were scared of Santa and didn't want to go up and see him. That's fine, but then it happened. Santa came over to both of them and gave them little gifts. Sydney had a Barbie that she was holding and wanted me to carry it around for her. I told her that I was taking the gifts and her Barbie out to our van so I didn't have to hold them all night long. Sydney got a little upset, but I told her that my decision was final, and she was fine. At that point K stepped in and said "Denny, just let her keep her doll if she wants. It's fine." HELL NO IT'S NOT FINE!!! I had told Sydney it was going to the van, and now Grandma was stepping in and making me look bad. So, I gave the doll back to Sydney for like two minutes before I took it back and went to the van. I didn't say anything to K because I didn't want to cause a scene, but I was seething. That's not all though. After Sydney ate, she wanted one of the cookies we had brought as our dish to pass. K heard me tell her that it was okay and that I would get her one. "We are not letting anyone have dessert until everyone eats dinner, Denny. She will have to wait." ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME???  Does K really want to keep her granddaughter from having a cookie, that we had brought mind you, or does she just want to make me look like an idiot to my daughter? I think it's the idiot thing. I'm basically positive that it's the idiot thing. Again, I was seething. This woman stood at the sink washing plastic plates and silverware for the better part of the evening, spending ZERO time with her daughter or grandkids. The same people she has given me hell for not being able to see much. She yelled at me once because she never sees her daughter due to us moving back to my hometown. So, needless to say, I was pissed off again at a get together involving K. 
I've come to a decision!
At this point, I'm done playing nice. Stacy has a hard time saying anything to K because she's her mother. I get that. She will always be her mother, no matter what happens between Stacy and I. However, I'm past the point of pissed. I will not have that woman continue to treat me like this. EVERY time we are around her, she says something that undermines my position as authority figure to my kids. EVERY SINGLE TIME! Well, that's over. We are going to their house on the 28th of this month to celebrate Christmas. I can GUARANDAMNTEE
I'm not sure if anyone reads this blog that will pass this information on to her, but if so, please know that I'm not imagining things. Stacy sees it every time it happens. She gets just as pissed about it, but for some reason we just let it go. The time for letting this sort of stuff go is over. I can just see a time in the future when my kids are older and they see Grandma basically telling their dad that they don't have to do what he says. What does that teach my kids? That Grandma runs the show and not Dad. That Dad doesn't have the balls to stand up and say that's not the case. That is what they will learn. Not happening.
Okay, I've ranted on long enough about this. What I'd like to know is if any of you have had in-law issues and how you went about solving those issues. Please feel free to give advise and tips on how I should handle the impending storm.
Once again, have a great day and enjoy your Sunday.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

The changing of my hair!

It's not what you're thinking!
So, the color of my hair has changed over the last couple of years, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. Now I know you're probably thinking I'm going to tell you about how I've found gray hairs popping up. That's not where I'm going with this though. My hair has turned black! Don't get me wrong, I have plenty of gray hair to go along with this new hair color, but who has their hair turn black? I mean really, black hair? If you notice the picture of my wife and I on our wedding day here on my blog, you will notice that I had a reddish/blondish/brownish type of hair color. It's not even close to that now. 
I wear my hair in a buzz cut now.
I used to have this really cool(Hey it's my hair and my definition of cool, so back off) wispy type of hair cut. I thought it looked really good. My wife even wishes I would grow it back out to that style. I just can't though. For the last five year or so, I've had Stacy buzz my hair. It's just easier for me. I can wear a stocking hat and not mess up my hair. I can get out of the shower and it's already looking like it's going to look for the entire day. It is the best hair cut in the whole world! Well, after a while of her cutting my hair, we started to notice that my hair was getting darker. I don't have any close up pictures that I can post that will show you just how dark it's gotten, but take my word for it, it's BLACK! I'm afraid that if I grew it back out, I would look like a Dufus. I'm so fair complected that black hair would just look weird. Well, that leads me to where I'm really going with this little blog post of mine.
I was hoping to avoid this.
I was really hoping I'd be one of those guys who avoided gray hair. It seems as though I am not that lucky though. I think nature has played a cruel joke on me with this black hair thing. Now that I am getting gray hairs, they REALLY show up in the black. With my old hair color, it seems to me that gray would blend in a little bit more. But NO, when a person has black hair and it starts to turn gray, it's called Salt-and-Pepper. I don't want Salt-and-Pepper in my food, yet alone my hair. (Actually salt and pepper are pretty good on food, so that's okay.) My hair is really turning gray along the sides above my temples. I think I look like that dude for the Sopranos! You know, this guy.




Yeah, he's got that gray thing going on down both sides of his head as well. It's great! My wife tells me that I don't, but I do. That's the main reason I keep my hair buzzed at this point. I don't want to look like that guy does!
Research.
So, I've done some checking and apparently stress can help to cause gray hair, but is not the main cause. The main cause seems to be heredity. So, instead of blaming my kids for stressing me out with some of their antics, I can probably blame my dad! Sure, he stresses me out, but if I remember correctly, I'm following the same path he did. His hair turned black, and then now he has grayish hair. Well, this gray crap didn't really start until I really became a SAHD, so I am going to blame the kids! Now I can have something to hold over both of the generations that are closest to me. When I talk to my dad, I can blame him. And, when I am with my kids, I can tell them "Look at what you kids have done to your Dad's hair!" 
The only problem is, I'm noticing gray in my goatee as well. I always said that if that turned gray, it would come off. I've worn the goatee for about 14 years now. I've shaved it a couple of times just for fun, and my wife hates the way I look without it. Now I have real problems huh?
Okay, I'm sorry I went on and on about this when it's really not a topic for SAHD blogs, but I just had to vent. I liked the color of my hair, and now it's changed. It's BS!
Anyone else have their hair change color? Let me know and we can compare notes. Have a great weekend!    

Thursday, December 9, 2010

How to explain death to a 5 year old.

She seems to be very curious.
Tomorrow my wife and I are going to travel to Ohio in order to attend a funeral for her aunt. We all know that funerals basically suck. No one likes having to attend a funeral, especially when you were close with the person who has passed. However what is making this particular passing hard is trying to explain it to my little girl. As I have mentioned many times in my blog, Sydney is only 5. I really think it's too soon to try and explain to her what death means. But, I also don't really like the idea of being less than honest with her. We have a wall that has pictures of my two grandmothers and one of Stacy's grandmothers. All three of them have passed, and all passed since Sydney was born. She was too young to really remember any of them. However, she does have some memories of two of them. And, all three pictures are of her sitting on the laps of our grandmothers. She sees the pictures every single day, and often asks about the ladies she sees. I've tried really hard to put it in terms that she can understand, but it's really hard. I told her that all of them have died, and of course I got "What does 'died' mean?" I basically explained as "they got old and sick and went to heaven to rest." I thought at the moment that it was the best way to go about explaining it. She asked me if I was sad when it happened. I was dumbfounded that my five year old was asking such a grown-up question. I had to explain to her that when each lady passed it made Daddy so sad that he cried. Well, she doesn't see her Daddy cry so of course it brought up another question that floored me. "Daddy will you be sad when I die?"
HOLY CRAP!!!
I'm pretty sure she didn't get the fact that Daddy is going to get older and die someday as well. I think she thinks Daddy is Superman, and well she should. That's how a little girl is supposed to see her Daddy. Well, I had to tell her that first of all, she isn't going to die. She's not allowed to. And, I had to tell her that if something ever happened to her and she died, Daddy would be more than just sad. I tried to tell her that if anything ever happened to her, it would probably be the end of her Daddy as well. I just don't know how to explain the whole concept to her at this point. I think this is one of those times where I'm lost as a parent.
Earlier today I explained to her that she wouldn't be going to school tomorrow and was staying with my parents for the day. She asked me why and I blurted out that Mommy and Daddy had to go to a funeral. I'm sure you can guess what her next question was. I told her that it was "a ceremony people have when someone dies." It was the best I could come up with at the moment.
Now I feel horrible.
I've been thinking about it, and I feel like I've swung and missed as a father in this matter. I feel horrible that I've even introduced her to this subject. I think five is too young to have to know anything about death. I wish I had never even told her what dieing meant. I want so bad to shield her from hurt and anything bad, even though I know I won't be able to forever. I just wish I had waited until she was a little older. But, what's the right age for this subject? I would hate for something to happen to Stacy or I and her(and her brother) have to learn the hard way. Does anyone have any ideas on how to handle this? Really, if you have any ideas or suggestions I'd love to hear them because I feel as though I have totally failed as a parent with this one.
A missed paragraph.
Completely changing the subject now. In my last post an entire paragraph was cut off for some reason. This is the second or third time it has happened, and I'm not sure why. I'm not sure if it's something I have done, or something that has occurred due to Blogger, but I really apologize. I think I'm going to start taking safeguards to prevent it from happening. That might me a good idea huh? Maybe I should actually pay attention to things that I attaching my name to!
Anyways, thanks for reading and I hope you don't have to deal with what I have had to. Hope you have a great day.       
 

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Cleanliness.


I think I'm a Butler!
I know the my job title is that of SAHD. I know that my job description is really vague. It is my job to basically do all things domestic in our home. It's kind of always been that way in my marriage to Stacy, and I don't mind. We have always had a kind of backwards relationship in that regard. I am the least mechanically inclined person to ever walk the earth. It's really disappointing to my dad, as he is very mechanically inclined to say the least. To this day if I tried to change the oil in my car, well let's just say the car would probably be totaled out when I was done. It's that bad. I can not put things together. At least not quickly or well. I occasionally try to put together a chair or a desk or something but without fail, there's something wrong with it, or I take a day and a half to do a half hour job. My mind just doesn't work like that. My wife's on the other hand does. When Christmas gets here, if we have any gifts for the kids needing assembly, Stacy will be on it. I'll be in charge of eating Santa's milk and cookies. That I can do!
As I was saying, my job description is vague. I am in charge of taking care of the kids, cleaning the house, doing laundry, paying bills, preparing meals, and watching sports on TV. I am good at all of those things too. I just get frustrated sometimes with my job description. The kids always need taking care of, the house always needs cleaning, there is always laundry that needs to be done, there is always bills that need to be paid, we always need meals prepared, and there is ALWAYS sports that I can watch on TV! It's a never ending cycle.
 I try. I really do.
I work really hard to keep our home running at optimum level, but I sometimes feel like I'll never get everything done. For example, today I had to wash some bedding that had been peed on(my son sometimes pees through his pull-up at night.) I had to fit that into all the other laundry that needed to be done. The dishes needed to be washed, the kitchen floor was in dire need of a sweeping and the kids needed to eat at some point. I also was up against a time limit. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining about having to do all of that. It's what needs to be done and I do it happily. The part that gets frustrating is, tomorrow I'll have to do pretty much the same thing all over again. The thing that gets me through it is that I've accepted that I'm never going to get it all done. If I don't get all the laundry done today, it will be there tomorrow waiting for me, with reinforcements. I can take that. If I don't sweep the floor today, that dirt will be there tomorrow waiting for me. If I don't feed the kids today, they can always wait until tomorrow to eat. Wait, that's not right. I guess I have to make sure I feed the kids, even though as I said here they don't always eat what I give them. I have just realized that it never ends so there is no sense stressing about it. I've said it before, I love my "job" and wouldn't trade what I get "paid" for anything else in the world. I get to be home with the kids and that's a currency that can't have a value placed on it. So tomorrow, I'm going to get up and attack that pile of laundry and try and make a dent in the sink full of dishes. I'm going to try and teach my kids all about what it takes to be a good person while I do all of my other work as well. And, I'm not going to bitch about. I promise! I'm going to make sure that my house is clean. Maybe it's my definition of clean, but by gosh, it's going to be clean!
I'm not sure how he does it!

One final thing tonight.
If you are like me and are a baseball fan, you will know that this week is one of the best weeks of the year. This is baseball's winter meetings week. This is the week all the teams gather in one place and get to make trades and free agent signings. It's really cool, and I probably won't be away from this monitor when I have a spare minute. It's so much fun.
With that, I'm done. You guys have a great night and I'll hopefully see you tomorrow.   
    

Sunday, December 5, 2010

I would just like 5 minutes!

Alone time.
When I was a single man, I longed for the day when I would be married and have kids. I was lonely all the time. I wasn't the type of guy who went out and partied a lot. I was always kind of a loner in my own right. I always liked to sit and watch my games by myself. I liked to sit and read quietly. I always liked to sit at the table and eat a meal by myself while reading the paper, or a book. And even though I like to do all of those things by myself, I absolutely longed for, yearned for, a woman that I could start a family with. Well, from just the title of the blog, you know that I found the perfect woman. And I mean PERFECT. All you guys out there who think you have the perfect woman, think again. My wife is, and I'll say it again, PERFECT! She gave me two amazing kids, and now I no longer have to be alone. DAMN! What was I thinking?
I didn't know!
I didn't realize that once you have kids, and especially when you're a SAHD, you NEVER get alone time. For example, today I got up and by the pure stroke of luck, the kids were still sleeping. I kissed Stacy goodbye as she left for work, and settled in at the table for my breakfast with the latest issue of Sports Illustrated. It was pure silence. The dog wasn't even up yet. I started reading an article and eating, and I swear I hadn't read the first paragraph, or swallowed my first bite of Eggo's when I heard Denny's very recognizable steps as he came downstairs. As any parent knows, he needed my attention immediately, and my alone time was over. For the next, oh 14 hours, I was never more than 2 or 3 steps from one or both of my kids. I love my kids more than I can even explain, but COME ON MAN!!! It gets a little redundant when the most grownup conversation you have is with your five year old about why she needs to change her underwear every day. I chose to be a parent, and I chose to be a SAHD. And, I love both of those titles immensely. I just would like a little peace and quiet from time to time.
My wife does understand!
Like I said, my wife is perfect. She knows that being with just the kids all the time gets a little stressful. She gets it. That's why last Saturday she came home from work and rounded up the kids and took them with her shopping. I got to stay home and watch my Duke Blue Devils play basketball. It was amazing. I sat in my chair for about two hours and watched the game. I didn't have to break up any fights, change any pull-ups, pull my son down from some high up perch he's not supposed to be on, take any objects they are not supposed to have away from them, kiss any boo boos, read any stories, watch any Disney movies, teach them any life skills, pretend to be a horse, or tell them that their art work is fantastic. Just pure alone time with my basketball game. Damn, I missed my wife and kids!
Be careful what you wish for.
Every single day I wish for just five minutes alone to just sit and not do anything. And most every day, I don't get that. And, I'm so glad I don't. I was miserable as a single man, and now I'm happy. I don't need alone time, I need my wife and kids.
I really hope you get the moral of my little blog tonight and that you have a great day.
Thanks for reading.   

Friday, December 3, 2010

Getting my kids to eat.

Isn't eating a requirement to live?
As most of you know, I have two kids. My daughter Sydney is 5, and my son Denny is 2. I'm not sure they are going to make it to adulthood because they don't eat! I have to fight with them every single meal to get them to actually put the food in their mouths, chew it up and swallow it. Sometimes Denny ends up throwing it, and sometimes Sydney wrinkles he nose at it and just sits there. I don't understand this behavior. I know for a fact that as humans they have to eat in order to stay alive. Plus, their parents both love to eat. Where this comes from is beyond me.
  See, he doesn't actually eat the food. He just smears it all over his face so it is no longer on his plate and it looks like he has ate it.
They don't seem to be wasting away.
Neither one of my kids are what you would call skinny. They are to over weight like their Daddy either. When they have gone for checkups, the Doc never seems worried about their body compositions. They just won't eat when we sit down to the table. They do eat snacks throughout the day of course. I give them yogurt a lot, and they love that. I try to stay away from the cookie and junk food type of things at snack times, but sometimes cookies find their little hands. So, I've tried to eliminate the snacks all together. They still just won't eat at meal time. I'm starting to think it's just a power struggle between them and me. Well, how do I win that one? I just can't bring myself to make them go hungry. I have to make sure they've eaten something before bed. I'm really at my wits end when it comes to this. Maybe they just don't like sitting at the table, I just don't know.
I've thought that maybe they don't like what I serve, but then again, I always ask them what they want. I try to make sure they have input into what we eat. Of course if I let Sydney decide, we would eat grilled cheese and tomato soup for every meal! She will eat when I make her that, but I can't just feed her that can I?
Does anyone have any tips on how to get my kids to eat? I'd really like to know how get them to eat at meal time. Please help! 

Thursday, December 2, 2010

The creepy guy at Wal-Mart!

He's not right!
I'm going to get a little off topic here tonight and talk about something that kind of relates to parenting, but kind of not. There is a guy at the local Wal-Mart that is known as Creepy Guy. No really, that's what everyone who works there knows him as. Yes, I used to work there, and yes I have referred to him as such. My wife still works there, and she had a bit of an incident with Creepy yesterday. Let me set the scene first.
This guy is probably late 50's, white hair and white beard. He is overly skinny and seems to have a bit of a hunchback. He used to always wear a Michigan ball cap, but now he wears a stocking cap and a Michigan jacket. He always rides his bike to the store and parks it outside. Now the really creepy part. This guy has spent time in prison for sex crimes. Because it was long enough ago, he doesn't have to register as a sex offender. This guy is really touchy with Wal-Mart associates, as well as customers. He has been banned from the store on at least one occasion, but has called Corporate and gotten the ban revoked. There is one WM employee in particular that he has been really creepy with. She will be known as T. She runs the Vision Center, which is the department my wife works in. He walks by the Vision Center and stares in at T in a leering sort of way. There has been a number of occasions where he has put his arm around T and made rude comments that dripped with innuendo. I have been told this guy goes to a local high school's football games and stands against the fence. Only he stands with his back to the game and watches the young kids play in the grass area next to the bleachers. Definitely creepy.
My problem with Creepy Guy.
This guy has put his hands on people other stores in the area, and been banned from them. WM is the only store in town that he can shop in because of this. Like I mentioned, WM has even banned him at least once. He complained to WM corporate that his rights had been violated when he was banned. I argue that his rights are not more important than the rights of the people who work and shop in that store. I think that WM has failed when it comes to T. She is terrified of this man and yet he is allowed to walk right by her place of work and for lack of a better word, stalk her. Like I said, he has put his hands on her in the past and made her feel uncomfortable. Especially knowing his past, poor T is absolutely terrified. When I still worked there I told T that whenever she saw him, to call me and I would come up and make sure he left her alone. Management informed me, and all other WM employees, that he was to be left alone and allowed to do what he wanted to in the store. They said that if he put his hands on anyone else, he was then banned for good. I contended that it shouldn't have to come to that. How do we know that the next time he touches someone, it's not with the intent to harm them? I also let it be known that if he touched, or so much as spoke to my wife, I would forcibly remove him from the store. Of course I was told that I would lose my job if it came to that. Not really an issue for me to lose that job if my wife is placed in an unsafe environment. Well, I don't work there anymore so that rule doesn't apply to me anymore!
Yesterday Creepy Guy was up to his usual tricks. He walked by the Vision Center and stared in at T. My wife got all fired up and told him to just leave. Of course she had a little attitude behind it. No wife of mine wouldn't! I guess Creepy and my wife went back and forth for a bit and he called her fat and told her to go sit on her fat ass! Needless to say, I'm looking for the jackass! My only problem is, my only real solution is physical violence. Where would that get me though? I'd kick his ass sure, but I'd probably be arrested. He would most assuredly press charges and then I'd have something on my permanent record. Plus, in his sick mind he may decide to go for vengeance against my family. He could try and go after my kids. That would not go well for him, but he could try. So, my question is, what should I do? I want to defend my wife's honor and protect T from any unnecessary harassment from Creepy Guy. But, I don't want any of the mentioned consequences. Maybe if I kicked his ass a little it would make sure he never bothers anyone again though. Anyone have any advise on this sort of issue? I just hate the thought of nothing happening to this guy and him getting to go out and hurt someone else. Maybe even a kid. I know if anyone ever laid a finger on either of my kids, I would probably go all Incredible Hulk on their ass and do things outside of my conscious mind!
Again, any advise? Keep in mind that I'd really like to kick his ass for what he said to my wife. 
New subject.
My wife and I only have our cell phones and no home phone. Well, my phone basically sucked. I would constantly drop calls here in the house and on a number of occasions I nearly threw the damn thing out the back window into the woods. Well, I got a new phone today!!! I'm very excited. It's one of those Smart Phones, so it's really cool. I feel like I'm from the future when I use it. Really though, isn't it amazing how far technology has come? If someone had told my great grandfather that someday we would have phones that we walked around with, not to mention all the other capabilities they have, he would have said they were crazy.
I love my new phone! Have a great night. 

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Sibling Rivalry

Brother vs. Sister.
My wife and I used to think we wanted three kids. We don't think that anymore. The reason we don't think that anymore is simple. Things sometimes get intense enough around here with two kids that adding a third child to the mix might make something bad happen.  Denny is crazy enough as it is, I can't imagine him as a middle child. And, if we did have a third child and it was a girl, poor Denny wouldn't stand a chance! So, we are sticking with the two kids we have. In the meantime, they have developed a nice little sibling rivalry. 
They do love each other.




As you can see from the picture above, Denny is a little insane like I've mentioned before, but they do get along at times. I hear them playing with each other sometimes and it's like music to my ears. We all know that the laughter of children is awesome, but when I hear these two kids laughing and playing with each other, it makes me giddy with joy. Then there are other times. Other times include the fighting, the hair pulling, the biting, the hitting, the pinching, the taunting and of course the tattling.  
I swear they hate each other sometimes. Their is a constant battle over the possession of one toy or another. Sydney insists that everything in our house is hers, and that she gets to supervise when and how every toy is played with. I swear the other day I heard her say "I didn't tell you you could play with your own toys!" She's that bossy and pushy with Denny. I feel for the poor boy. Then I remember that at two years old, he's almost as big as his five year old sister and can inflict some pretty good damage onto her. Sydney has little hand sized bruises on her forearm right now from Denny grabbing her as hard as he can for some reason or another. I sometimes feel like a boxing official and that I have to send them to neutral corners before they come out fighting again.
They will grow out of it though. I think?
I would like to think that my kids will grow out of this phase they are in. I'd like to think that there will come a time in life when I don't have to worry about them causing bodily harm to each other, but I'm not sure that's going to be the case. I remember my sister and I fighting like cats and dogs as we grew up. There was always something she was doing that pissed me off. And, there was always something I was doing that she could go tell Mom about. Well, today the relationship is nonexistent over something a lot more grownup. But even through early adulthood our relationship was always strained. I think that to this day she believes that I was favored as the oldest child. My youngest sister(I have two younger sisters) and I have a great relationship. I consider her a friend as well as my sister. It was just the sister closest in age that I had issues with. I feel bad that things have turned out how they have and I always wonder if I did anything to cause her to feel about me the way she does. I hope and pray that my kids learn to get along and realize that fighting will get them nowhere good. 
While my sister and I have always had a rocky relationship, my wife and her brother on the other hand, have always had a good one. Stacy tells me that her brother and her always got along and never fought. I'm sure there were instances of fighting, but even today I can see where they are friends. I hope that my kids learn to develop that type of relationship. Maybe they will due to the fact that there won't be any other kids around. Maybe they will team up together against Mom and Dad. Just what I need. I already have a hard time moving around, I don't need to have them coordinate their efforts! 
Do you have any instances of sibling rivalry and how has that turned out for you? I'd love to hear any ideas on how to foster better relationships between siblings.
With that, I'm done for the day. Have a great night and see you tomorrow.