The changing of my hair!

It's not what you're thinking!
So, the color of my hair has changed over the last couple of years, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. Now I know you're probably thinking I'm going to tell you about how I've found gray hairs popping up. That's not where I'm going with this though. My hair has turned black! Don't get me wrong, I have plenty of gray hair to go along with this new hair color, but who has their hair turn black? I mean really, black hair? If you notice the picture of my wife and I on our wedding day here on my blog, you will notice that I had a reddish/blondish/brownish type of hair color. It's not even close to that now. 
I wear my hair in a buzz cut now.
I used to have this really cool(Hey it's my hair and my definition of cool, so back off) wispy type of hair cut. I thought it looked really good. My wife even wishes I would grow it back out to that style. I just can't though. For the last five year or so, I've had Stacy buzz my hair. It's just easier for me. I can wear a stocking hat and not mess up my hair. I can get out of the shower and it's already looking like it's going to look for the entire day. It is the best hair cut in the whole world! Well, after a while of her cutting my hair, we started to notice that my hair was getting darker. I don't have any close up pictures that I can post that will show you just how dark it's gotten, but take my word for it, it's BLACK! I'm afraid that if I grew it back out, I would look like a Dufus. I'm so fair complected that black hair would just look weird. Well, that leads me to where I'm really going with this little blog post of mine.
I was hoping to avoid this.
I was really hoping I'd be one of those guys who avoided gray hair. It seems as though I am not that lucky though. I think nature has played a cruel joke on me with this black hair thing. Now that I am getting gray hairs, they REALLY show up in the black. With my old hair color, it seems to me that gray would blend in a little bit more. But NO, when a person has black hair and it starts to turn gray, it's called Salt-and-Pepper. I don't want Salt-and-Pepper in my food, yet alone my hair. (Actually salt and pepper are pretty good on food, so that's okay.) My hair is really turning gray along the sides above my temples. I think I look like that dude for the Sopranos! You know, this guy.

Yeah, he's got that gray thing going on down both sides of his head as well. It's great! My wife tells me that I don't, but I do. That's the main reason I keep my hair buzzed at this point. I don't want to look like that guy does!
Research.
So, I've done some checking and apparently stress can help to cause gray hair, but is not the main cause. The main cause seems to be heredity. So, instead of blaming my kids for stressing me out with some of their antics, I can probably blame my dad! Sure, he stresses me out, but if I remember correctly, I'm following the same path he did. His hair turned black, and then now he has grayish hair. Well, this gray crap didn't really start until I really became a SAHD, so I am going to blame the kids! Now I can have something to hold over both of the generations that are closest to me. When I talk to my dad, I can blame him. And, when I am with my kids, I can tell them "Look at what you kids have done to your Dad's hair!" 
The only problem is, I'm noticing gray in my goatee as well. I always said that if that turned gray, it would come off. I've worn the goatee for about 14 years now. I've shaved it a couple of times just for fun, and my wife hates the way I look without it. Now I have real problems huh?
Okay, I'm sorry I went on and on about this when it's really not a topic for SAHD blogs, but I just had to vent. I liked the color of my hair, and now it's changed. It's BS!
Anyone else have their hair change color? Let me know and we can compare notes. Have a great weekend!    

How to explain death to a 5 year old.

She seems to be very curious.
Tomorrow my wife and I are going to travel to Ohio in order to attend a funeral for her aunt. We all know that funerals basically suck. No one likes having to attend a funeral, especially when you were close with the person who has passed. However what is making this particular passing hard is trying to explain it to my little girl. As I have mentioned many times in my blog, Sydney is only 5. I really think it's too soon to try and explain to her what death means. But, I also don't really like the idea of being less than honest with her. We have a wall that has pictures of my two grandmothers and one of Stacy's grandmothers. All three of them have passed, and all passed since Sydney was born. She was too young to really remember any of them. However, she does have some memories of two of them. And, all three pictures are of her sitting on the laps of our grandmothers. She sees the pictures every single day, and often asks about the ladies she sees. I've tried really hard to put it in terms that she can understand, but it's really hard. I told her that all of them have died, and of course I got "What does 'died' mean?" I basically explained as "they got old and sick and went to heaven to rest." I thought at the moment that it was the best way to go about explaining it. She asked me if I was sad when it happened. I was dumbfounded that my five year old was asking such a grown-up question. I had to explain to her that when each lady passed it made Daddy so sad that he cried. Well, she doesn't see her Daddy cry so of course it brought up another question that floored me. "Daddy will you be sad when I die?"
HOLY CRAP!!!
I'm pretty sure she didn't get the fact that Daddy is going to get older and die someday as well. I think she thinks Daddy is Superman, and well she should. That's how a little girl is supposed to see her Daddy. Well, I had to tell her that first of all, she isn't going to die. She's not allowed to. And, I had to tell her that if something ever happened to her and she died, Daddy would be more than just sad. I tried to tell her that if anything ever happened to her, it would probably be the end of her Daddy as well. I just don't know how to explain the whole concept to her at this point. I think this is one of those times where I'm lost as a parent.
Earlier today I explained to her that she wouldn't be going to school tomorrow and was staying with my parents for the day. She asked me why and I blurted out that Mommy and Daddy had to go to a funeral. I'm sure you can guess what her next question was. I told her that it was "a ceremony people have when someone dies." It was the best I could come up with at the moment.
Now I feel horrible.
I've been thinking about it, and I feel like I've swung and missed as a father in this matter. I feel horrible that I've even introduced her to this subject. I think five is too young to have to know anything about death. I wish I had never even told her what dieing meant. I want so bad to shield her from hurt and anything bad, even though I know I won't be able to forever. I just wish I had waited until she was a little older. But, what's the right age for this subject? I would hate for something to happen to Stacy or I and her(and her brother) have to learn the hard way. Does anyone have any ideas on how to handle this? Really, if you have any ideas or suggestions I'd love to hear them because I feel as though I have totally failed as a parent with this one.
A missed paragraph.
Completely changing the subject now. In my last post an entire paragraph was cut off for some reason. This is the second or third time it has happened, and I'm not sure why. I'm not sure if it's something I have done, or something that has occurred due to Blogger, but I really apologize. I think I'm going to start taking safeguards to prevent it from happening. That might me a good idea huh? Maybe I should actually pay attention to things that I attaching my name to!
Anyways, thanks for reading and I hope you don't have to deal with what I have had to. Hope you have a great day.       
 

Cleanliness.

I think I'm a Butler!
I know the my job title is that of SAHD. I know that my job description is really vague. It is my job to basically do all things domestic in our home. It's kind of always been that way in my marriage to Stacy, and I don't mind. We have always had a kind of backwards relationship in that regard. I am the least mechanically inclined person to ever walk the earth. It's really disappointing to my dad, as he is very mechanically inclined to say the least. To this day if I tried to change the oil in my car, well let's just say the car would probably be totaled out when I was done. It's that bad. I can not put things together. At least not quickly or well. I occasionally try to put together a chair or a desk or something but without fail, there's something wrong with it, or I take a day and a half to do a half hour job. My mind just doesn't work like that. My wife's on the other hand does. When Christmas gets here, if we have any gifts for the kids needing assembly, Stacy will be on it. I'll be in charge of eating Santa's milk and cookies. That I can do!
As I was saying, my job description is vague. I am in charge of taking care of the kids, cleaning the house, doing laundry, paying bills, preparing meals, and watching sports on TV. I am good at all of those things too. I just get frustrated sometimes with my job description. The kids always need taking care of, the house always needs cleaning, there is always laundry that needs to be done, there is always bills that need to be paid, we always need meals prepared, and there is ALWAYS sports that I can watch on TV! It's a never ending cycle.
 I try. I really do.
I work really hard to keep our home running at optimum level, but I sometimes feel like I'll never get everything done. For example, today I had to wash some bedding that had been peed on(my son sometimes pees through his pull-up at night.) I had to fit that into all the other laundry that needed to be done. The dishes needed to be washed, the kitchen floor was in dire need of a sweeping and the kids needed to eat at some point. I also was up against a time limit. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining about having to do all of that. It's what needs to be done and I do it happily. The part that gets frustrating is, tomorrow I'll have to do pretty much the same thing all over again. The thing that gets me through it is that I've accepted that I'm never going to get it all done. If I don't get all the laundry done today, it will be there tomorrow waiting for me, with reinforcements. I can take that. If I don't sweep the floor today, that dirt will be there tomorrow waiting for me. If I don't feed the kids today, they can always wait until tomorrow to eat. Wait, that's not right. I guess I have to make sure I feed the kids, even though as I said here they don't always eat what I give them. I have just realized that it never ends so there is no sense stressing about it. I've said it before, I love my "job" and wouldn't trade what I get "paid" for anything else in the world. I get to be home with the kids and that's a currency that can't have a value placed on it. So tomorrow, I'm going to get up and attack that pile of laundry and try and make a dent in the sink full of dishes. I'm going to try and teach my kids all about what it takes to be a good person while I do all of my other work as well. And, I'm not going to bitch about. I promise! I'm going to make sure that my house is clean. Maybe it's my definition of clean, but by gosh, it's going to be clean!
I'm not sure how he does it!

One final thing tonight.
If you are like me and are a baseball fan, you will know that this week is one of the best weeks of the year. This is baseball's winter meetings week. This is the week all the teams gather in one place and get to make trades and free agent signings. It's really cool, and I probably won't be away from this monitor when I have a spare minute. It's so much fun.
With that, I'm done. You guys have a great night and I'll hopefully see you tomorrow.   
    

I would just like 5 minutes!

Alone time.
When I was a single man, I longed for the day when I would be married and have kids. I was lonely all the time. I wasn't the type of guy who went out and partied a lot. I was always kind of a loner in my own right. I always liked to sit and watch my games by myself. I liked to sit and read quietly. I always liked to sit at the table and eat a meal by myself while reading the paper, or a book. And even though I like to do all of those things by myself, I absolutely longed for, yearned for, a woman that I could start a family with. Well, from just the title of the blog, you know that I found the perfect woman. And I mean PERFECT. All you guys out there who think you have the perfect woman, think again. My wife is, and I'll say it again, PERFECT! She gave me two amazing kids, and now I no longer have to be alone. DAMN! What was I thinking?
I didn't know!
I didn't realize that once you have kids, and especially when you're a SAHD, you NEVER get alone time. For example, today I got up and by the pure stroke of luck, the kids were still sleeping. I kissed Stacy goodbye as she left for work, and settled in at the table for my breakfast with the latest issue of Sports Illustrated. It was pure silence. The dog wasn't even up yet. I started reading an article and eating, and I swear I hadn't read the first paragraph, or swallowed my first bite of Eggo's when I heard Denny's very recognizable steps as he came downstairs. As any parent knows, he needed my attention immediately, and my alone time was over. For the next, oh 14 hours, I was never more than 2 or 3 steps from one or both of my kids. I love my kids more than I can even explain, but COME ON MAN!!! It gets a little redundant when the most grownup conversation you have is with your five year old about why she needs to change her underwear every day. I chose to be a parent, and I chose to be a SAHD. And, I love both of those titles immensely. I just would like a little peace and quiet from time to time.
My wife does understand!
Like I said, my wife is perfect. She knows that being with just the kids all the time gets a little stressful. She gets it. That's why last Saturday she came home from work and rounded up the kids and took them with her shopping. I got to stay home and watch my Duke Blue Devils play basketball. It was amazing. I sat in my chair for about two hours and watched the game. I didn't have to break up any fights, change any pull-ups, pull my son down from some high up perch he's not supposed to be on, take any objects they are not supposed to have away from them, kiss any boo boos, read any stories, watch any Disney movies, teach them any life skills, pretend to be a horse, or tell them that their art work is fantastic. Just pure alone time with my basketball game. Damn, I missed my wife and kids!
Be careful what you wish for.
Every single day I wish for just five minutes alone to just sit and not do anything. And most every day, I don't get that. And, I'm so glad I don't. I was miserable as a single man, and now I'm happy. I don't need alone time, I need my wife and kids.
I really hope you get the moral of my little blog tonight and that you have a great day.
Thanks for reading.   

Getting my kids to eat.

Isn't eating a requirement to live?
As most of you know, I have two kids. My daughter Sydney is 5, and my son Denny is 2. I'm not sure they are going to make it to adulthood because they don't eat! I have to fight with them every single meal to get them to actually put the food in their mouths, chew it up and swallow it. Sometimes Denny ends up throwing it, and sometimes Sydney wrinkles he nose at it and just sits there. I don't understand this behavior. I know for a fact that as humans they have to eat in order to stay alive. Plus, their parents both love to eat. Where this comes from is beyond me.

  See, he doesn't actually eat the food. He just smears it all over his face so it is no longer on his plate and it looks like he has ate it.
They don't seem to be wasting away.
Neither one of my kids are what you would call skinny. They are to over weight like their Daddy either. When they have gone for checkups, the Doc never seems worried about their body compositions. They just won't eat when we sit down to the table. They do eat snacks throughout the day of course. I give them yogurt a lot, and they love that. I try to stay away from the cookie and junk food type of things at snack times, but sometimes cookies find their little hands. So, I've tried to eliminate the snacks all together. They still just won't eat at meal time. I'm starting to think it's just a power struggle between them and me. Well, how do I win that one? I just can't bring myself to make them go hungry. I have to make sure they've eaten something before bed. I'm really at my wits end when it comes to this. Maybe they just don't like sitting at the table, I just don't know.
I've thought that maybe they don't like what I serve, but then again, I always ask them what they want. I try to make sure they have input into what we eat. Of course if I let Sydney decide, we would eat grilled cheese and tomato soup for every meal! She will eat when I make her that, but I can't just feed her that can I?
Does anyone have any tips on how to get my kids to eat? I'd really like to know how get them to eat at meal time. Please help! 

The creepy guy at Wal-Mart!

He's not right!
I'm going to get a little off topic here tonight and talk about something that kind of relates to parenting, but kind of not. There is a guy at the local Wal-Mart that is known as Creepy Guy. No really, that's what everyone who works there knows him as. Yes, I used to work there, and yes I have referred to him as such. My wife still works there, and she had a bit of an incident with Creepy yesterday. Let me set the scene first.
This guy is probably late 50's, white hair and white beard. He is overly skinny and seems to have a bit of a hunchback. He used to always wear a Michigan ball cap, but now he wears a stocking cap and a Michigan jacket. He always rides his bike to the store and parks it outside. Now the really creepy part. This guy has spent time in prison for sex crimes. Because it was long enough ago, he doesn't have to register as a sex offender. This guy is really touchy with Wal-Mart associates, as well as customers. He has been banned from the store on at least one occasion, but has called Corporate and gotten the ban revoked. There is one WM employee in particular that he has been really creepy with. She will be known as T. She runs the Vision Center, which is the department my wife works in. He walks by the Vision Center and stares in at T in a leering sort of way. There has been a number of occasions where he has put his arm around T and made rude comments that dripped with innuendo. I have been told this guy goes to a local high school's football games and stands against the fence. Only he stands with his back to the game and watches the young kids play in the grass area next to the bleachers. Definitely creepy.
My problem with Creepy Guy.
This guy has put his hands on people other stores in the area, and been banned from them. WM is the only store in town that he can shop in because of this. Like I mentioned, WM has even banned him at least once. He complained to WM corporate that his rights had been violated when he was banned. I argue that his rights are not more important than the rights of the people who work and shop in that store. I think that WM has failed when it comes to T. She is terrified of this man and yet he is allowed to walk right by her place of work and for lack of a better word, stalk her. Like I said, he has put his hands on her in the past and made her feel uncomfortable. Especially knowing his past, poor T is absolutely terrified. When I still worked there I told T that whenever she saw him, to call me and I would come up and make sure he left her alone. Management informed me, and all other WM employees, that he was to be left alone and allowed to do what he wanted to in the store. They said that if he put his hands on anyone else, he was then banned for good. I contended that it shouldn't have to come to that. How do we know that the next time he touches someone, it's not with the intent to harm them? I also let it be known that if he touched, or so much as spoke to my wife, I would forcibly remove him from the store. Of course I was told that I would lose my job if it came to that. Not really an issue for me to lose that job if my wife is placed in an unsafe environment. Well, I don't work there anymore so that rule doesn't apply to me anymore!
Yesterday Creepy Guy was up to his usual tricks. He walked by the Vision Center and stared in at T. My wife got all fired up and told him to just leave. Of course she had a little attitude behind it. No wife of mine wouldn't! I guess Creepy and my wife went back and forth for a bit and he called her fat and told her to go sit on her fat ass! Needless to say, I'm looking for the jackass! My only problem is, my only real solution is physical violence. Where would that get me though? I'd kick his ass sure, but I'd probably be arrested. He would most assuredly press charges and then I'd have something on my permanent record. Plus, in his sick mind he may decide to go for vengeance against my family. He could try and go after my kids. That would not go well for him, but he could try. So, my question is, what should I do? I want to defend my wife's honor and protect T from any unnecessary harassment from Creepy Guy. But, I don't want any of the mentioned consequences. Maybe if I kicked his ass a little it would make sure he never bothers anyone again though. Anyone have any advise on this sort of issue? I just hate the thought of nothing happening to this guy and him getting to go out and hurt someone else. Maybe even a kid. I know if anyone ever laid a finger on either of my kids, I would probably go all Incredible Hulk on their ass and do things outside of my conscious mind!
Again, any advise? Keep in mind that I'd really like to kick his ass for what he said to my wife. 
New subject.
My wife and I only have our cell phones and no home phone. Well, my phone basically sucked. I would constantly drop calls here in the house and on a number of occasions I nearly threw the damn thing out the back window into the woods. Well, I got a new phone today!!! I'm very excited. It's one of those Smart Phones, so it's really cool. I feel like I'm from the future when I use it. Really though, isn't it amazing how far technology has come? If someone had told my great grandfather that someday we would have phones that we walked around with, not to mention all the other capabilities they have, he would have said they were crazy.
I love my new phone! Have a great night. 

Sibling Rivalry

Brother vs. Sister.
My wife and I used to think we wanted three kids. We don't think that anymore. The reason we don't think that anymore is simple. Things sometimes get intense enough around here with two kids that adding a third child to the mix might make something bad happen.  Denny is crazy enough as it is, I can't imagine him as a middle child. And, if we did have a third child and it was a girl, poor Denny wouldn't stand a chance! So, we are sticking with the two kids we have. In the meantime, they have developed a nice little sibling rivalry. 
They do love each other.

As you can see from the picture above, Denny is a little insane like I've mentioned before, but they do get along at times. I hear them playing with each other sometimes and it's like music to my ears. We all know that the laughter of children is awesome, but when I hear these two kids laughing and playing with each other, it makes me giddy with joy. Then there are other times. Other times include the fighting, the hair pulling, the biting, the hitting, the pinching, the taunting and of course the tattling.  
I swear they hate each other sometimes. Their is a constant battle over the possession of one toy or another. Sydney insists that everything in our house is hers, and that she gets to supervise when and how every toy is played with. I swear the other day I heard her say "I didn't tell you you could play with your own toys!" She's that bossy and pushy with Denny. I feel for the poor boy. Then I remember that at two years old, he's almost as big as his five year old sister and can inflict some pretty good damage onto her. Sydney has little hand sized bruises on her forearm right now from Denny grabbing her as hard as he can for some reason or another. I sometimes feel like a boxing official and that I have to send them to neutral corners before they come out fighting again.
They will grow out of it though. I think?
I would like to think that my kids will grow out of this phase they are in. I'd like to think that there will come a time in life when I don't have to worry about them causing bodily harm to each other, but I'm not sure that's going to be the case. I remember my sister and I fighting like cats and dogs as we grew up. There was always something she was doing that pissed me off. And, there was always something I was doing that she could go tell Mom about. Well, today the relationship is nonexistent over something a lot more grownup. But even through early adulthood our relationship was always strained. I think that to this day she believes that I was favored as the oldest child. My youngest sister(I have two younger sisters) and I have a great relationship. I consider her a friend as well as my sister. It was just the sister closest in age that I had issues with. I feel bad that things have turned out how they have and I always wonder if I did anything to cause her to feel about me the way she does. I hope and pray that my kids learn to get along and realize that fighting will get them nowhere good. 
While my sister and I have always had a rocky relationship, my wife and her brother on the other hand, have always had a good one. Stacy tells me that her brother and her always got along and never fought. I'm sure there were instances of fighting, but even today I can see where they are friends. I hope that my kids learn to develop that type of relationship. Maybe they will due to the fact that there won't be any other kids around. Maybe they will team up together against Mom and Dad. Just what I need. I already have a hard time moving around, I don't need to have them coordinate their efforts! 
Do you have any instances of sibling rivalry and how has that turned out for you? I'd love to hear any ideas on how to foster better relationships between siblings.
With that, I'm done for the day. Have a great night and see you tomorrow.