Sydney & Denny

Sydney & Denny
September at the Park

Monday, November 21, 2011

Penn State tragedy

So, I've waited and waited until now to make my feelings on this subject known. In case you have been living under a rock for the last few weeks, you probably know all about what took place at Penn State. A former assistant coach, Jerry Sandusky, has been accused of, for lack of a better word, molesting young boys. The man is just not right!
 I guess one of my biggest problems with the whole situation is, how can a grown man be sexually attracted to young boys? I mean for all of time, the majority of men are attracted to women, but even those that are attracted to other men, are attracted to MEN, not young boys!!! What the heck is the matter with Sandusky???
Like I said, that is just ONE of my problems with the whole situation. What bothers me the most is how that man has affected the lives of his alleged victims. I say "alleged" because legally, the man is due his day in court, but I believe in my heart that Jerry Sandusky is guilty of all charges. I personally have never went through anything remotely close to what those young boys went through, however I have to believe that they will carry with them for the rest of their lives what happened to them. I have to believe that the fear they felt while they were raped, as I'm sure any rape victim feels, will be with them forever. I have to believe that they will probably never be able to trust any man again. That man basically used his influence as a football coach at a huge, prestigious football school as a way to lure in his victims. There are witnesses who say they walked in on him with a young boys hands on the wall of the shower while Sandusky was behind him and a rhythmic slap of skin was heard. So what happened? I'm sure we can all connect the dots. There is a witness who claims to have seen Sandusky performing oral sex on a young boy! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS MAN???
So what happens next? Well, we can never change the fact that the victims have been violated, and I don't think any punishment of Sandusky is going to heal those poor young boys. However, I know what I'd like to see happen. I'd like to see something pretty graphic take place, and I'm going to describe it to you here so if you have a weak stomach, or don't like graphic descriptions, skip down to the next paragraph. I'd like to see Jerry Sandusky be aroused to the point of erection, then I'd like to have someone sever his penis from his body! At that point, you shove the mans severed penis in his mouth and let him bleed out! I feel that would be a very painful way to go and in my opinion he desearves to die a very painful, slow death! I hope that I haven't offended anyone other than Jerry Sandusky, however if I have, remember this is my blog and I'm entitled to an opinion just as much as you are.
Do I even have to spell out what would happen if someone EVER touched one of my kids in an inappropriate manner? Awhile back I did a post about something very similar, and made my feelings known about it, read it here. I'm sorry, but if someone touched my kids like Jerry Sandusky did those young boys, I would turn into somebody I'm not. In all reality, I couldn't be held responsible for my actions, and would be able to claim temporary insanity, if it were my kids. I'm sure also that I'm not the only one who would be like that. Many of us would go apeshit if someone touched our kids.
I haven't even gone into detail about all the periphery people and their actions involving the Penn State sex case. There are too many details to discuss, I just wanted to let my feelings about what Jerry Sandusky did and maybe see if you are in agreement with me.
With that, I hope all of you have a great Thanksgiving and are safe on the roads!

Friday, November 11, 2011


I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S BEEN SIX YEARS!So Wednesday was my little girl's sixth birthday! Where in the heck does the time go anyway? I can think back to that day six years ago when she was born and it really does seem like just yesterday. I'll always remember the nervousness I felt that day. I had known my wife was pregnant for basically nine months, so I knew I was going to be a father, but that day that she was born, man it really became REAL! She was about two and a half weeks early and was born by c-section because she was sitting in there breech.  I'll always remember the anxiety I felt when the doctors made me wait outside the operating room while they administered the spinal block to my wife. They had told me it would be about 15 minutes and they would come get me. Well, about 25 minutes later I still sat there by myself. FREAKING OUT! At that point, everything that could go wrong was going through my mind. Turns out, they just forgot about me! My wife had to remind them to go get me, and that's just sad. I guess people are used to women having babies by themselves, and those that didn't know the patient well enough just assumed I didn't exist.
Well, it wasn't long and they held up a beautiful 8lb. 10oz. little girl for us to see! Literally at that moment life changed!  It wasn't long and I was in another room with Sydney in the warmer, while they stitched up my wife, that she grabbed my finger in her little hand. I was trying to talk to the little girl but it was unintelligible to even a newborn due to the sobbing! I was a DADDY!!!
It was then that I became the most torn person in the world. My wife had a horrible reaction to the anesthesia and got so sick. She couldn't stop vomiting and to this day has no recollection of holding her first born child for the first time. I didn't know what to do, be with my new baby(who also had some issues and stopped breathing when I fed her the first time) or my sick wife. Obviously, everything worked out okay and now I have this amazing little girl:
So we celebrated her birthday in the proper way, food, cake and ice cream, friends and family, and presents! She got all the stuff she asked for including:
Yep, she's spoiled! 
  A while back she had a loose tooth that needed to come out, and she's a Drama Queen when it comes to ANYTHING THAT MIGHT HURT! She was freaking out and I promised her a puppy if she let us pull the tooth out. Well, she let us and now she has her puppy! I had to get her one since she went ahead and let up pull the tooth, and I felt like that wasn't something I could go back on my word with, hence the puppy!
So now I have two dogs in the house!!! What was I thinking??? She named the little guy Rider after the main male character in "Tangled." It's her current favorite movie.
Well, I hope you enjoyed my little story, and feel sorry for me. I want your pity because I'm so wrapped around that little girl's finger, I have NO chance!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011


I've went on and on here in my blog about my lack of professional success in life, and it's a "woe is me" type of thing. Well, that is not the tone of this post at all. Lately, I've gotten very introspective about my life and what I've actually accomplished(or have not accomplished that is.) I'm really trying to figure out why it is that I've fallen short of my goals in life. And, the thing is, I see this as a teaching opportunity. If I can figure all of this out, make a change in my life, it will show my kids that if you decide to put your mind to something, you can accomplish it. I feel like I have no legs to stand on when I tell them that now, and that if I don't figure this out, I won't have any legs to stand on when I tell them that in the future as they get older.
So many times in my life I've had the opportunity to do what I've always dreamed of doing. As far back as junior high, I've known that I want to teach and coach. I feel in my very soul that I'm meant to do those things. I've been in and out of college in the twenty years since graduating high school, and let every single opportunity go by the wayside. WHY??? That's the question I keep asking myself, and I have no answer for. I've always been told that I'm a very intelligent person, I even tested at genius level once on an IQ test. So, it seems like I'm more than smart enough to finish a Bachelor's Degree. So, there must be something else. I can sit here and make all sorts of excuses for myself such as getting sick during my first semester of college as an 18 year old, continuing to be in poor health as a young adult, and now being sick with my current ailments. BUT, they are all just excuses. So many people in the world have overcome WAY more than what I've had to deal with. So, there must be something else! What I keep asking myself now is, what is it that makes one person able to put everything else aside and accomplish their goals in life, while I sit here wishing I had? Why is that my buddy is living the exact life I have always dreamed of living? He is a football and baseball coach at a good high school, he has a beautiful family, a nice house and car. He is happy. Why was he able to do all that, and I haven't been able to? Now, that's not to say that I'm not happy, because I definitely am, but I want so much more. The fact is, I am going to be without an income in the next couple of months, and I'm not in a position to just go out and get a job that pays any kind of decent wage. For a person without a college degree right now about the only jobs out there are what I left 14 months ago. Stocking shelves, heavy physical labor. Well, as I've told all of you MANY times over, I'm unable to do that anymore. The job(career) I want requires a college education, and I don't have one.

So here I sit trying to figure this all out. I messed up and let the college loans I took out years ago slip into default status. Well, I can't afford to just pay for the classes I need to finish my degree out of my pocket. I also am unable to receive any financial aid to attend college due to my defaulted student loans. On top of that, I am unable to afford to make the nine monthly payments that I need to make in order to get those loans out of default. So what do I do? I really don't even know, and that's the problem. What did I miss in life that made me the person who makes excuses rather than getting things done? Is is something in my DNA, or something NOT in my DNA? Why didn't I realize a long time ago that I NEEDED to get that degree? Why is it that so many other people realize what they need to do in order to reach their goal, do those things, and accomplish what they wanted, yet I don't?

So, I've always heard that the first step to fixing a problem is admitting you have the problem. Well, I know I have this problem, and now I am asking you for help. How do I fix this situation before it gets worse, and more importantly, before my kids slip into the same pattern??? I want my kids to see that if you pull yourself up, you can make it all the way back. I just don't know how to do that. Any thoughts? Please!      

Wednesday, October 19, 2011


Well, I think it's fair to say that at some point, all of our lives have gone a different direction than we had planned. I'm no different than anyone else in that regard. When I was a young man, let's say high school age, I had my whole life planned out. I had become somewhat realistic and accepted the fact that I wasn't going to a huge college to play any sports. Bummer, but at least I knew it wasn't the case. So, I decided that I wanted to go to college somewhere near home, get my teaching degree, find a job teaching high school and coaching one of my favorite sports. I'd meet some beautiful girl who would fall head-over-heels in love with me, we would have a family and live the old cliche' happily ever after.
Well, let's just say, that didn't happen! I won't go into great detail over where and how things veered off course in my plan(I've done that way too many times as it is.) I do want to tell you of some sort of "condition" I think I may have. I say "condition" because I don't know if it's something that other people may experience, or if I'm just the freak that I've always suspected myself of being!

I've always had this feeling in the back of my mind, or my soul, or my heart, or somewhere I'm not aware of, that even though I've made mistakes in life(and I mean A LOT of mistakes) I'll get it right the next time I go through life. I know: unhealthy!
Now I don't know if anyone else does this, of if they do, there is a name for it, but I think I've let it hold myself back in life. I haven't accomplished nearly anything in life that I have always wanted to, and I think this "condition" is the reason why! Okay, I'm tired of calling this a "condition", so I'm going to give it a name. How about something like "lazyafraidofsuccessprocrastinatingdufussness?" Okay, that's probably too long so maybe something like "lupus." No, that's taken. Maybe, "DennisSyndrome" I LIKE THAT!!! I'll name this, we will call it a phenomenon, "DennisSyndrome!" 

So, does anyone else in the world feel as though when they get a second chance, a reset button maybe, that they will get it all right? I can't be the only one who stands in the shower thinking about all the times I've screwed up in life and that I'll do it all right the next time right? Somebody else out there has to have let themselves down and justify it to themselves that they won't do it again when they go through life the next time right? I'm not alone in my ability to fool myself right?

Something just occurred to me. I HAVE accomplished something in life besides having the most beautiful wife and kids imaginable! I have an entire phenomenon named after me!!! That's right "DennisSyndrome" is a real thing, and it afflicts millions of people around the world who don't "seize the day." On top of that, I have a cure for this phenomenon! It's called "Getoffyourassanddostuff." It's in large quantity in all of us, we just have to find a way to release it. I think I'll start a public service announcement!  

Monday, October 17, 2011


So, I have this problem, and I've told you all about it many times. My health sucks, and in case you haven't read my accounts of it, here you go. On top of the RA, and the Fibromyalgia, I now have some sort of issue causing me esophageal issues that I have to take yet another pill for. And, on top of that, I'm undergoing tests to determine if I'm diabetic! So yeah, I have health issues to deal with. But, that's not the point of this blog post/rant. What I really want to talk about is my health insurance!

Every two weeks my wife receives a paycheck from her employer, and every two weeks they take out health insurance premiums. I'm not going to go into specifics of what we pay, but it's not terribly cheap, and it's not outrageously expensive either. But, she does pay it, and in return shouldn't we expect to receive health care coverage? Yeah, that's not too much to expect is it? Well, that's not what I am receiving at this point. And, I'm sure if you went around this great nation of ours, mine would not be the only case like this. 
How am I not receiving health insurance benefits you might ask? Well, let me tell you about one instance in particular. Bear with me, this might take a couple paragraphs. About a month ago, my wife had the day off, I think it was a Tuesday. I woke up in my typical amount of pain, stiffness and fatigue. It's a regular thing for me anymore, and I'm starting to get used to it. However, as the morning progressed, I started to feel a pain in my abdomen that is not my "usual" pain. I can only describe it as feeling as though a ninja had taken his sword and attempted to cut me in half at my belly button! Yeah, it hurt like that. I laid on the couch writhing in pain, knowing that I have had instances of this a handful of times in the last couple of years. What usually happens is I show up at the ER, they get my vitals, set me up in a room, give me pain meds(usually pretty powerful stuff like dilaudid,) make me drink some contrast so I can have a CT scan of my abdomen, get the results and tell me everything looks clear, and are unsure what is causing me so much pain. So, basically nothing gets done other than I get pain medication. Well, this last time was a little different, a doctor actually took the time to listen to what was bothering me and was able to hopefully solve the problem. She figured out from listening to me that it isn't in my bowels(from which I had my entire large intestine removed due to Ulcerative Colitis.) It is more of an esophageal issue and she prescribed me Prilosec. At last, a solution!
Of course, here is where my current rant comes from. Last week we received in the mail the typical explanation of benefits from our insurance company, BC/BS, telling me that none of my ER stay was covered by them due to "Diagnosis is Pre-Esisting." Let's just say WHAT THE HELL???
This explanation of "benefits" by BC/BS is just the last straw for me. I am unable to work at this point due to my health, and I'm lucky enough to still be drawing unemployment for a couple of more weeks, and believe me I'm totally grateful for that, but it's not enough for our family to get by. My wife works and earns what would today be called a decent wage, but again it's not enough. We never have enough money to pay all of our bills on time, but we manage our finances so that nothing is too late. Where the problem arises is my medical bill. I see a family doctor, a rheumatologist, and of course my ER visits. On top of that, they all want blood work done, so I have to go to a lab. Well, all of those doctors and labs charge money every time I go there, and they bill my insurance. My insurance doesn't cover all of any of those visits, leaving me with an unpaid balance to all of those parties. Well, I make payments to all of them, as little as $10 per month, but it's gotten to be too much. I had to change family doctors because the one I was seeing said my balance was too high and my payments too low, and they refused to see me. Now with the insurance company refusing to pay for a NEEDED ER visit, which was only $6,549.25! I have no way of paying that, so what am I going to do? No, I'm really asking you, what am I going to do??? It's getting to a point where no one is going to see me because I can't pay for my medical bills, yet I can't get a good paying job to take care of the medical bills due to a serious medical situation! So, this is exactly what "a rock and a hard place" feels like!!! What's the point of my wife having insurance premiums taken from her check if that insurance company isn't going to pay any of my medical bills??? It just seems really unfair that this insurance company is looking for a reason to not pay out on something like this. So, from now on when I have intense pain that makes it feel as though my insides are going to burst out of my body, I'll just stay home and suffer. I guess that's where we are headed in this country. The phrase "I can't afford to be sick"
Does anybody out there in the blog world have any ideas on how to fix this predicament? If so, I'd love to hear them please!!!

What is it about bacon that after you make it on a Sunday morning, you can still smell nothing but bacon in your house on Monday afternoon??? Don't get me wrong, I LOVE bacon, but at this point, the smell is starting to make me a little sick to my stomach!

Monday, September 26, 2011

5 Going on 18!

Okay, I have a problem that I could use your help with. I have a daughter! Yep, that's the issue I have. I fathered a female, that's the big problem. Now, don't get me wrong or anything, I love having a daughter. She's the love of my life, along with her brother and mother, and I guess our dog. However, she absolutely has me wrapped around at least one, if not all, of her fingers. She is the epitome of a spoiled Daddy's girl. Of course, this is where the "real" problem arises. She has developed a bit of what most people would call an "ATTITUDE." 
Couldn't she just be a model?
So, here's where the attitude becomes a problem. She likes, and thinks it's okay, to tell me no. I'm not talking about if I ask if she wants onion rings instead of fries. I'm talking about the times when I tell her that it's time to go upstairs and brush her teeth for bed. That's right, she will tell me no to that. That is after she has ignored my first, and probably second, request to do said task. Then when I get upset and tell her in no uncertain terms that she HAS to get up from what she's doing and go upstairs to brush her teeth, she will use that teenage sarcastic tone, "I'm going!!!" Yep, attitude. 
So, I have a couple of choices at this point. I can yell and holler and threaten bodily harm. Of course, she knows that with all my health issues, she could probably kick MY ass at this point. And, I don't really want to have to hold the threat of violence over my kids. 
Or, I can go the route of taking things from her if she doesn't stop with the attitude. That's usually the way I go. Ever since she was about two years old she has had this stuffed dog that she named "Bean" for some reason.(Yes, my great-aunt told her at my grandfather's funeral service that it's a stupid name for a dog, hurting her feelings and pissing me right off, but it's the name she chose!) Well, I've resorted to taking Bean from her on occasion and that just devastates her now. But, what am I going to do in a few years? What am I going to do when a stuffed dog is NOT one of the most important items in the world to her? What am I going to take from her in the future, and what am I going to do when she realizes that a day or two without some item isn't that big of a deal? What am I going to do then???
I'm actually asking you!

So, I was a pretty easy to handle teenager(you know I'm right Mom.) I basically didn't get into trouble, and I always respected my parents. It was all about sports for me. I went to school so I could play sports. Is there anyway I could get that lucky as a parent? I doubt it because she's a girl. And, if she's anything like her mom, I'm in huge trouble. Yes, my wife was(is) boy crazy. I'm just worried that this attitude that Sydney has going on now, is going to carry over to the teenage years when she herself is boy crazy. I'm going to have a huge problem then because even though I was a good kid, I know what boys that age are like! So, am I just crazy(probably) thinking like this? Is it stupid to worry that attitude at age five is going to carry over to her teens? I know that I'm a worrier, but I'm stressing that I'm not doing a very good job now and it's going to lead to problems when she's older. 


It's not any better than it was at the time of my last post. In fact, it's gotten worse. I can't walk much at this point, and had to miss the wedding of one of my oldest/best friend. It really bothered me to miss his wedding due to my health and I'm getting really sick of having to worry about my health!
I hope all is well with you, and that you have some great ideas for how much I should worry about my little girl's attitude.  

Friday, September 23, 2011


Okay, I'm sure most of you who have more than one kid will know, at least somewhat, about what I'm about to tell you. Every morning during the school week we have to get up to get Sydney off to school, and that alarm clock always seems to come way too early.  Of course, my 3 year old son Denny, always seems to beat the alarm by at least a half hour, causing his mother and I to yell and holler at him before we are even out of bed. But, the alarm does come and signal the start of yet another day. 
How that day goes is usually decided in the next thirty minutes after that dreaded alarm goes off. I say that because Sydney is NOT a morning person and my wife usually has to dress her for school while she's still in bed because apparently her body just won't work before 8am. Why the first half hour decides the day though is usually decided by Denny. If he is in his havoc wreaking mood(usually) it could lead to lots of stress for this Stay at home Dad. For example this morning: After we managed to get downstairs and get food into both their bellies, the kids were in the living room. Sydney was at her morning zombie best, and Denny was at his trouble making best. I was trying to read the paper online when I hear, "Don't hit me Denny!!!" I then hear Sydney land the first blow, a smack to his back. At this point, I know what's coming next is not going to be good. As I turn and look at the morning activities, I see my son perform a flying karate kick and yell "HIIYAAA" at the top of his lungs. Of course, it was just the first in a series of flying kicks that he executed, landing only one or two on his sisters leg. 

It's really hard to dole out discipline when the scene you witness is just too funny at first glance. Forget about the fact that he was trying to cause bodily harm to his sister, the way he was spinning while kicking and yelling out his battle cry was just too much for me. I had to stifle a laugh while maintaining the role of disciplinarian and yell out that in no uncertain terms do we not hand out flying karate kicks at our sister. I managed to contain my laugh and get the situation under control before any ER visits were needed, but the scene will stick with me for a long time. It was that funny.  My wife was upstairs getting ready for her work day during the morning fisticuffs and when she came downstairs to receive her morning situational report, she said she could hear my laugh/yell all the way upstairs. It really is hard to be a tough guy when the kid is as funny as Denny has been lately.

The scene I just described to you is really just another example of how my little boy has been lately. He has really gotten into the superhero type of stuff, and I think that's great. Especially since it hasn't been uncommon to see him putting on a dress and carrying a purse with his big sister and the little girl I watch after school. So, him thinking he's Spiderman is actually a good thing in my eyes. The only problem is, and you have to picture this in your mind, he REALLY thinks he's Spiderman at times, and will run headlong into a wall and attempt to stick to and climb said wall! Yeah, it's like that!

Just to give all of my loyal concerned readers an update, I have been somewhat diagnosed with two more ailments that are not fun. In addition to the Fibromyalgia and Auto-immune Arthritis that I have, I spent this past Tuesday in the ER and was told I have a severe Gastrointestinal issue that I have to take yet another two pills each day for. On top of all that, I received a call from my Rheumatologist who said my most recent blood work showed that I have high blood sugar. Now, I have to change my entire diet/lifestyle in order to keep that in check. So, health wise, this hasn't been the greatest twelve months of my life, but it could be a lot worse. I'm going to make it, and I'm going to get to the goals I set for myself A LONG TIME AGO!
Hope you have a great weekend, and did anyone notice that my Detroit Lions are actually good and that my Detroit Tigers won their division??? What a time to be a fan of Detroit professional sports! 

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Being Humbled

So today was kind of a rough day. I didn't feel the best in regards to my health issues and it had more to do with others health than my own. The last few days it's been hard to get any sleep. Both of my kids have been sick with Hand Foot and Mouth syndrome. It's made me feel horrible. I feel horrible because I've always thought that was an illness kids got when their surroundings were not kept clean(I don't actually know if that's the case, but once I get a thought in my head, it's there probably forever.) Well, it has kept both of my kids from sleeping soundly due to sores in their mouths, especially my son. He wakes up just about every hour crying due to the pain in his mouth, so I get up with him so my wife who has to work every day can get some sleep. So, my sleep is all messed up, I feel guilty because my kids have this(and just to set the record straight, our house is far from dirty to the point of making my kids sick, but I still feel like it's my fault somehow.) This stress has caused me to have what I refer to as a flare up of my illness, making me hurt, tired to the point of delirium, and I guess a little cranky. But that's not why I'm up tonight.
Yes, my son is having his issues tonight, so I'm up with him because of that. His sister seems to be a day ahead of him in this illness crap and she was pretty much fine today so here's hoping the boy will be fine tomorrow. But what's making me have a hard time sleeping tonight is something new. 
I got a phone call from my mom today informing me that my dad has bladder cancer! I know, it's a shock huh? Well, it's really got my mind racing and if you know me, you know I already have an issue with thinking too much. My mind is going places tonight I definitely don't want it to go. I'm having thoughts that I never dreamed I'd have. You see, my dad is Superman! He's had his own health issues the last few years, and he's not the same man he was when I was growing up in reality. However, in my minds eye, I will always see him as the guy who could save me from anything that scared me. My dad and I don't have the closest of relationships for whatever reason, but I've always looked up to him for so many reasons, and while bladder cancer isn't a death sentence, just the thought that it could be is enough to make me think things I don't want to think. And yes, I put up a good front that I'm not worried, and that I know he will be fine, but...

I realize how lucky I am. I've had both of my parents alive, married to each other, and close by for my entire life. While I don't think this is the end for him, just the mere thought of my dad not being there makes me shudder. I don't know if I'm the world's greatest dad, or even an average dad, but I know that I would be a lot worse at the job if my dad wasn't around. Like I said, I've always seen him as Superman, and I've always aspired to be just that for my kids, and it's hard to think of a world without him. So, that is why I am asking anyone who might happen to read my blog here to send prayers to my dad. He's strong, but even Superman needs help every now and then. The thing is, I don't know if I'm strong enough to live in a world without him.
Thank you for reading this, and I hope you have a great night/day.  

Monday, August 22, 2011

The Return!

So, it has been almost three months since I've posted on my blog here in blog world, and I'm sure all of you have been waiting on pins and needles for my return.  I'm sure you are all wondering why I just stopped posting my amazingly brilliant blogs and my disappearance has saddened you all. Well, maybe nobody has been saddened by it, but I'll bet someone has been a little curious at least.  Well, I've got a fairly serious condition going on that is keeping me from blogging like I used to. I first mentioned being in pain here on my blog on November 15 of last year. I have gone to my family doctor about this condition, and he kind of pooh-pooed it and kept me on the pain meds that I was already on for my shoulder arthritis. Well, that didn't help at all. I happened to run into a friend of mine from high school who also had developed an auto-immune condition, and she recommended I see her doctor. Now, while I trust my family doc, he wasn't doing anything for me in terms of diagnosing the problem I had. He kept telling me that my blood work was normal so he couldn't treat me for anything even if I showed all the symptoms. Frustrating!

I was able to get into my friend's doctor, and it has changed things for the better for me. This doctor specializes in cases like mine and was able to diagnose me with Auto-immune Arthritis and Fibromyalgia. Let me tell you, they both suck. These two illnesses combined are what has been keeping me from blogging like I would like. The thing is, it's not even the pain that stops me. It's the fatigue! A symptom of both conditions is extreme fatigue. I get so darn tired it's hard to function sometimes. There are days when I wake up in the morning that I'm not sure my legs are going to be able to hold me up. I usually did all of my blogging at night after the family had went to bed. Now, I'm so tired from being a SAHD(and we all know how tiring that can be) on top of the fatigue from my condition(s) that I absolutely have to go to bed at an early hour. So, that's why the blogging has fallen off. Plus, I don't want to put out a bunch of blogs that are basically me complaining about my condition. You don't want to hear that I'm sure. Plus, I'm tired of telling everyone about it.

I'm trying to figure that out myself. I am in the process of getting a disability claim started, but the most important question involves this blog. Am I going to to be able to blog on a daily(or semi-regularly) basis? I know that I want to, but I'm not going to make any promises to you, or to myself. I have good days and bad days with this condition and I know I won't be able to write on the bad days, and sometimes not on the good days. Today has been a decent day but just writing this much has hurt my hands and arms, as well as tiring me right out. So don't get your hopes up that I'm going to be super blogger(not that I ever was) and put out funny, insightful, thought provoking blogs all the time. You will have to take what you can get and like it! I hope you do enjoy reading what I do write, and it's good to kind of be back!

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Parenting Rule #1!

My first decree!
That's right, you read that correct. Children are no longer allowed to grow up, especially my children. And by grow up I mean they have to stay the age they are now, forever!

Why, you ask?
Well, I'll tell you why. Because from my own experience, the problems of children get more complicated as they get older. Right now it's actually pretty easy for me to break up any arguments between my kids over who owns the piece of crap plastic toy that they are fighting over. That's an easy one. Right now in life my kids rarely listen to what I have to say. I can deal with that when it comes to them not putting on their shoes when I tell them, or not sitting up to the table properly when I tell them, or when they won't stop fighting with each other when I tell them to, or when they just won't sit down while I'm trying to catch my breath from solving the last problem. I can deal with that, but what's going to happen when they won't listen to me when I tell them to be home by midnight? What's going to happen when they won't listen when I tell them I don't want them dating the person that they currently "love?" What's going to happen when I tell them to not use their cell phone(or whatever devise we have invented ten years from now)while they are driving and they don't listen? What's going to happen when I tell them to save their money and they don't listen, spend it foolishly, then come to me for money that I don't have? What's going to happen when I tell them to drive carefully, but they don't listen to me and get into an accident that hurts(or worse)them? You see, all of those instances come with consequences I can't deal with. I can't deal with the thought of my kids ever being hurt in any way right now, so I know that as they grow older and their decisions and problems become more complex and more difficult to solve, I have no way of helping them. I have a hard enough time keeping myself together as an adult, so I'm not sure I will be able to be a father to a grown child. That is why I, as the President/Grand Pooba, of all things parenting(at least in my own mind) have decreed that children are not allowed to grow up from this point forward!

Will they listen?
I doubt it because they haven't listened to anything I've said in the past, so why would they start now. However I have made the decree and new Parenting Rule #1 that they are no longer allowed to grow up!!! They are forever to stay at this age:
They look so amazing, but believe me the evil lies within!
  Do I even need to put this to a vote?
I have a feeling that most of you that are parents will agree 100% with me on my first new Parenting Law. I don't see why we even need to put this to a vote, but if you want to disagree with this new law, you are welcome to voice your opinions in the comments section. I will take your opinions under consideration, and then tell you why I am right and you are wrong. This is the most perfect law that has ever been thought of!
Good night, and I hope it's not raining to the point of needing an arc where you are like it is here!  


OH, IT'S ON!!!

I have been thinking about my blog here for a while now and how I've kind of let it slide. I haven't been as diligent about putting out interesting, and somewhat thoughtful blog posts. Yes, I've been sick/hurting a lot over the last few months, but the fact remains I've let my blogging responsibilities slide. I let myself get lazy about it, and that has got to stop. That's why I've come up with a new idea that will always(hopefully anyway) give me something interesting, and maybe a little funny, to write about.

 Yes, that is right, I'm going to write about the law on a steady basis. Now before you all start groaning with disappointment, let me explain. I'm not going to write some stupid old boring blog about the legal system. I'm going to come up with a new law. The Law of Parenting!!! I am going to write as many new Parenting Laws as I can come up with for your reading pleasure. Of course, if you feel strongly enough about a law that you come up with, you are welcome to submit it. However, since I am the self-appointed judge/jury/president/grand pooba of this Parenting Law blog, I get final say as to weather your suggestion is enacted.
With that, I bid you a good night and wish you a restful nights sleep. You are going to need it as there will be lots of information for you to retain coming soon. Like tomorrow, so get ready. I mean it, get to bed so you can be ready for the first new law tomorrow. Go now!  

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Coaching T-Ball!

Well, we are all still here!
After the scare we all had this weekend with the whole End of the World thing, it's good to be here typing this blog. I mean, I was "really" worried that the earth was going to open itself up and swallow us all whole! I thought for sure that I was out of time, and that I wasn't going to get to do all the things I wanted to do in life. Well, we are still around, and I plan on taking full advantage of my time here by doing something fun and amazing like...

The beginning of a Hall of Fame career!
 That's right, I'm coaching T-Ball. I know that there have been other SAHDs who have claimed that they would never do such a thing, but I am having a blast. My daughter told me she wanted to play ball this year, and of course I trust no one else to coach her other than myself! The only thing is, I couldn't sign up to just coach Sydney. I had to coach an entire team! Well, I couldn't have been luckier with the team I was given. I have so many different personalities and I'm having so much fun getting to know all of them this season.
This is the T-Ball Champions of the World!
Some of the kids don't know a whole lot about playing ball, and it's all about having fun for them. I love that. When I played T-Ball as a kid, it was blood and guts, and I loved that! I mean we kept score, league standings, champions and even had an All-Star team(of course I made the All-Star team!) Either way is great, it's really about the kids having fun, and I really think I'm doing a good job making sure my team has a good time. I mean it's kind of funny to look over and see the little girl playing first base throwing her glove up in the air and catching it. Or the girl playing third base doing cartwheels out into left field, or the boy playing right field and the girl playing first base starting their own game of tag, but it's all good. As a die hard ball player all my life this has been so good for me. These kids are a little too young to be playing all out to win yet. That will come for them in the coming years, but until then it's all about having a blast.

While it's all about having fun for the kids and I, it still makes me puff up with pride when Sydney belts one off the T and it goes through the infield like a rocket and just keeps running through what would be an outfield and she ends up with what would be a HOME RUN!!! That's right, my little girl hit a home run tonight, and I was so proud of her. She has so much athletic ability that I can see at this point, but I'm not sure she really wants to be an athlete. She is a total princess, and says she wants to be a cheerleader. She looks like a ball player in her little uniform though, but if she doesn't want to play sports, I'll be okay with it. I want my daughter(and son of course) to be happy in what they do in life no matter what it is. However, it would make me so proud if they chose to play sports like Daddy did! I think my boy is going to play sports because he wants so bad to be a part of this team, and is even in our team picture, and gets so frustrated when he cant. He's just a little too young yet, but his day will come. 
I REALLY hope that the parents of the kids on my team think that I'm doing my job properly and that all the kids are having as much fun as I am with this. I know my writing has been a little choppy tonight, but it's because I keep thinking about all the kids on the team and how much I am TRULY LOVING THIS!!! 
That's right, she's my girl and she hit a HR tonight!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Things I want to do before the world ends today!

OMG, Is this really happening?
I've heard A LOT  of stuff the last couple of days about the world ending, and it really upsets me. There are so many things I want to do before the world ends, mostly just to say I've done it, but some of them are because I really WANT to. I've read a few articles on this here Internet thing that says there is supposed to be an earthquake around noon est. That gives me a little over two and a half hours to do the following.

1. Graduate from college with my BA.
    I'm only about a semester and a half away, so two hours should give me enough time to get it done.
2. Do some sort of workout.
    That way in whatever sort of afterlife that there is, I can say I was trying to get into shape when it all ended.
3. Learn to play an instrument.
    I have no knowledge how to play anything musical, and it would be nice to know how to play one.
4. Find out what the heck the creators of "Lost" were thinking with that ending!
    I mean really? What the heck was that whole thing about? I think they could have come up with better!
5. Get my son to stop pooping in his pants!!!
    He REFUSES to poop in the toilet, and I'm tired of changing a 3 year old's poopy pants!
6. Write a "Star Wars" movie that takes place between "Revenge of the Sith" and "Star Wars: A New Hope." 
     I think it would be a perfect place to introduce some characters(Han Solo as a kid) who were only in the original trilogy. There is so much story there that could be told, and I think I'm the perfect person to tell it!
7. Finish cleaning out our basement.
    I've been putting off cleaning it for way too long now!
8. Finish reading the three books that I'm currently reading.
    Not sure why I'm reading three at once, but I think this is self explanatory.
9. Take a nap!
    Well, I like naps, and I'm kind of tired right now, so...
10. Spend the final few minutes we have on Earth with my family.
      Again, kind of self explanatory. My family is more important to me than anything in the world, and if this is our last day alive, I want to go out looking at, and holding them.
11. Start writing my blog daily again.
      I really enjoy writing this, and lets face it, you REALLY enjoy reading my stuff!

The end is near!
With that, I wish you all good luck on this last day on Earth. Oh, that's right, today is only the beginning of the end of the world. We still have five months of natural disasters to live through before God ends it all. Also, I guess for all of this to happen you have to believe some guy who owns a lot of radio stations and has just generated a lot of PR for his company. 
I'll see you all tomorrow!

Saturday, May 7, 2011

The Third Edition of Random Thoughts on a Saturday!

                                   I kind of HATE this guy!

Random Thoughts!

1. Why is it that when you want a callback from a customer service person they don't call, but when you least need a random call, it's RING RING?

2. I think that when the price of gas goes up, there should be an explanation as to why! Just random increases  seem completely unfair!

3. There isn't much worse than when your cable/Internet are down because you're cable provider(AT&T) sucks!

4. How is it possible that my wife and I have the same cell phone, but mine gets crappy signal in our house, but hers works perfect?

5. May is the best month of the year, by far! The weather is turning nice, there are all sorts of sports on TV, and I just love it!

6. I'm so glad my son, who turns three on Wednesday, is finally showing an interest in toys for boys! Because he has a big sister, it was common to see him walking around with a purse! That's all fine, but I like playing with trucks too!

7. I feel like I'm on the verge of something amazing!

8. Tomorrow is Mother's Day AND the seventh anniversary of my marriage to the most beautiful, amazing, tolerant woman in the world!

9. I think President Obama is being a p*ssy by not showing the pictures of bin Laden! I say we use it as a means of determent to other terrorists.

10. I don't remember the last time I had a Flav-o-ice! I used to love those as a kid!

11. One of my kids thinks burps and farts are hilarious! I bet you would be surprised to know it's my five year old daughter!

12. Is it bad that there are some days I can hardly move due to RA, but I still want to play golf as much as possible?

13. I think it's so cool that even though there are days that I can't move, and can't play with them, my kids still think I'm Superman!

14. My wife and I are going on our first date tonight in I don't even know how long! Dinner and then probably going to see "Thor."

15. I bought my wife a really cool present for Mother's Day/Anniversary, and my son told her what it was!

16. I think it's weird that I get so excited to see my son's poop in the toilet! He's making progress.

17. I hate having to shave. I wish there was some product that prevented facial hair on men so I wouldn't have to.

18. I wish I could work out without pain so I could make myself built like Alex O'loughlin from "Hawaii Five O." That way my wife would lust after me like she does him!

19. Where do they put the caffeine when they take it out of products?

20. I used to think I was the Incredible Hulk! Now every Halloween I tell people not to make me angry! I know, I'm a bit of a dork!

21. I think that some of the recent technological inventions that are out there are AMAZING!!! iPAP, come on, that's impossible right???

22. Sometimes I ramble on about nothing meaningful. Kind of like now!

I really hope you enjoy my random thoughts, and if you have any of your own, feel free to add them to the comments.


Tuesday, May 3, 2011

I HATE the word "can't!!!"

My daughter says it all the time!
As the title of this post says, I HATE the word "can't." That's not to say that I haven't used the word, often, in my life. I have used the word as a cop out as to why I haven't done this or that in my life. I've put it in my mind that I "can't" do this or "can't" do that because of whatever circumstances I've decided that made whatever I was referring to impossible. I think it's fair to say most, if not all, people have used the word "can't" at some point in their life. I however, have used the word WAY more than necessary in my life. I've used physical reasons as to why I can't do things. I've used financial reasons as to why I can't do things. I've used lack of desire as a reason to use the word. You name it, I've used it as a reason to say "can't" and give up. And, now what really bothers me, is my little girl says the damn word ALL THE TIME!

Living through them.
I'll admit it, I want to live vicariously(good thing there is spell check because I'd have no chance to spell that word.) through my children. I don't mean that I want my kids to like the same things as I do(maybe a little) and do all the activities that I have. I don't want my son to play sports just because I did, and the same for my little girl. I want them to find things they love doing, and give their all at those things. Be it, school, sports, farming, dancing, music, underwater basket weaving, whatever they choose. But yes, I want to live through them. I want them to do what I never did. I want them to realize that the old saying "where there's a will, there's a way" is actually true. I want them to not make the same mistakes I have made. I want them to realize that if you really want something, you can make it happen with the right attitude and effort.
That is why when my daughter says "I CAN'T DO THIS!!!" it drives me bananas! Even when it's only about tying her shoe, or opening a package of gummies, or finishing a homework assignment(yes she gets homework even in pre-k!) I have been trying like heck to get that word out of her vocabulary right now! My thoughts are, if I can get her to stop using the word now, as she gets older she will have no use for the word. She will realize that anything is possible. 
She gets so darned frustrated sometimes, and that really frustrates me. She will be attempting to do something such as tying her shoe, and will be having a problem with it because she is just a little girl and sometimes little girls have problems tying  shoes. She will get so upset and yell that she can't do it. I have to remind her that the word "can't" is not to be used and that she just needs to take her time and think about what she's doing and then she will be able to do it. Ultimately she gets the shoe tied, or the package opened, or the Barbie dressed. So, I guess my approach on this is working. 
I think it's working because I'm like the WORLD'S GREATEST DAD!!! What do you think??? Maybe the reality is that I'm the WORLD'S MOST DELUSIONAL DAD!!! But that's okay as long as my kids learn they can do whatever they set their minds to! 

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Watching them grow.

I'm amazed!
Recently we went and had family pictures taken, and they turned out amazing! My wife was able to make copies of pictures from the disc we were given and had one of them up on the fridge, and I was admiring it today. It happened to be right next to an informal family picture taken a little over two years ago, and I was floored by the change in our family. Denny was just a baby then, and Sydney was still in diapers. I just can't get over the change in my kids. I mean, I know kids are going to grow and get bigger, but it just made me shake my head. It also really made me realize something. I realized just how much I am enjoying watching them grow up.
I realize just how lucky I am, and I've stated that many times in my blog, but to see just how beautiful both of my children are, as well as my wife, made me really count my blessings. Both of my kids are healthy and happy and that's all I ever want from life anymore, so I feel like a lucky man in that respect. I just know that if anything serious ever comes up, I'm going to have a REALLY hard time. I felt horrible a couple of weeks ago when my kids were sick with the flu, I can't imagine if something hard core was wrong with them. I read a blog from a lady whose little boy is going through some health issues, and I just feel so bad for her. Yes, I feel bad for the little boy, but I know how hard it must be for her. If you don't already follow "Mama Still Wears Gucci" you can read her blog here. She's a really good writer, and usually quite funny. My heart goes out to her, and it makes me realize that much more how lucky I am.
Back to my amazement!
  The other thing that makes my jaw drop is how fast these kids are learning. When Sydney started school in September, she could kind of write her name recognizable. Now, she writes her first and last name like a pro. Sure her handwriting isn't perfect yet, but it's still awesome that she can do what she can. And Denny, wow! He's actually behind in his development but I think that's my fault. He turns three in about two weeks and he doesn't really talk yet and isn't potty trained fully. The thing is, over the last two weeks I've watched him grow in both areas so much. He is putting two words together finally, and he's telling me when he needs to go poop! My wife and I keep telling each other, "He's getting there." It's just amazing to see that development happen in front of me. I am so happy that I get to watch these things happen. Maybe I wouldn't get to see it as much, or as clearly, if I wasn't a SAHD, so that's one more reason to be happy I stay at home! (Another is that I get to sneak in some golf on Xbox most days, but we won't mention that here!)
Enough already!
Ok, I've gushed about how great my kids are and how lucky I am enough now. I'll just say this while we were having our family pictures taken, in the shot below this paragraph, I have never felt so much pride in my entire life. I am proud to be Stacy's husband, and I am proud to be the father to my kids. I know I'm not perfect, but I wish there were more men out there who felt the same. 
Seriously, am I the luckiest man alive or what? I know I've said it before, but I can't say it enough!

Monday, April 18, 2011

Parenting while sick!

It's SO hard to do!
Let me set the scene for you a little bit okay? For all of the week prior to last, both of my kids were sick with the flu. First Sydney had it, then Denny got it. And when I say sick, I mean SICK! They were both throwing up until there was nothing left in their poor little bodies to throw up, and then they just dry heaved. They had it coming out the other direction horribly as well. Poor Denny isn't 100% potty trained yet and after his couple of days of puking were over he got the runs that he had no control over at all. He would tell us "Poop!!!" That was my wife and I's cue to strip him naked, carefully putting his overflowing pull-up into a garbage bag, and then using our detachable shower head to hose him off. We did this at least five times. At least he was up to date with his showers! So as I said, my kids were really sick. Then my wife and I got it!
Of course I get it worse than her. DUH!!!
Well, with my already questionable immune system(and I've mentioned this a number of times in the past, try to keep up)I got this wretched sickness way worse than my wife. Or, maybe she's just tougher than me. It's possible I promise. She threw up once and had the backend issues, but I was SICK, SICK SICK! I carried a bowl around with me to puke into. That is when I could move. I got so bad at one point I cried out to my wife to take me to the ER because I felt like I was dieing! I did go to the ER and was given fluids and pain meds as treatment for dehydration. I was sent home, but it didn't stop there. The next day I was still sick the whole day. At one point I went upstairs to "sleep" and the next thing I remember, I was in an ambulance! Apparently I passed out on the landing of our steps and was delirious. I spent quite awhile in the ER again that night and was finally diagnosed with a UTI, the flu, and Mono! In addition to severe dehydration. So as you can see I was/am pretty sick. I feel so run down that I don't make it through the day without a nap.  
They know!
As you can see, the scene I set for you is pretty uncomfortable for anyone. What makes it worse is when you feel that crappy and still have to take care of kids. As I said, my wife was feeling less than good herself so she stayed home from work with me. If she hadn't, there might have been big problems. I might have caused bodily harm to both of my kids using only my stare! It was like they knew when we felt the worst and that's when they were the neediest. As I'm sure you know it's very hard to fix someone a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch when you can't keep anything down yourself. Especially when the smell of the peanut butter is enough to make you nauseous.  Then just when you get settled back on the couch with your puke bowel and your blanket, "DADDY, I need more juice!" "He's kicking me!" "AAAHHHHH!!!" And it goes on like that for what feels like FOREVER!!!  Just when you finally fall asleep for the first time in a day someone is pulling the others hair, someone hit someone, someone is looking at someone, someone has someone elses toy, someone needs even more juice, someone wants a snack, someone has to go potty, someone(the dog) needs to go out, someone wants to watch a movie that has been missing for months now and if you don't look for it then someone is screaming, someone wants to play on the computer, someone won't leave someone alone while they play on the computer, and on and on and on and on... Is it any wonder I ended up in an ambulance without any recollection as to how?
The thing is, most parents can handle that. Most parents can put everything they feel aside and still be SuperMom or SuperDad to their kids. I wish I could, but I just can't. With my body system being what it is, when I get sick, I get REALLY sick to the point of not being able to function. My wife is one of those people and she did an amazing job the last couple of weeks and I can't thank her enough for it. I really wish I could be one of those people like my wife is and be able to set aside my illness and still take care of the kids. It makes me feel weak that I can't, but at least I have her and supporting parents(they helped by taking the kids while I was hospitalized.) The thing is, HOW IN THE BLUE HELL DID I GET MONO??? I hardly ever leave my house and only deal with kids here!
How do you do it?
I'd be really interested in any tips or stories as to how you might handle being sick and still taking care of your kids. Please drop me a comment and perhaps some advise on better coping with this sort of thing. Thanks and I hope you don't get what I've had. I've heard mono is very contagious, but I don't think you'll get it by reading my blog!  

Thursday, April 7, 2011

To go pro, or not to go pro!

I'm back! For now.
First of all I am actually feeling really good the last couple of days, so I thought it was time to get back in the old computer chair and start banging out amazing, awesome, cool, mostly important only to me, blogs. So, I'm going to talk to you about a topic that has been on my mind a bit today.
As most of you know, Duke basketball is not very far down on the list of things I love in life. I am a little obsessed to say the least. Well, today one of Duke's best players announced that he was leaving school after his freshman season to enter the NBA. At first I was REALLY upset by this because it makes next year's team a bit weaker. If Kyrie Irving were to stick around at least one more year, Duke could be considered a favorite to win the national championship, making me a very happy guy. And, let's face it, that's really what it's all about. So, because he's leaving, I'm upset.
Being a parent changes my outlook.
For years now I have always disliked the idea of guys leaving school early to enter the ranks of professional sports. I have always liked the idea of a guy(or girl actually) sticking around for four years, earning a degree, and growing as an athlete and a person. I always thought that the pros are always going to be there, what's the rush? Well, if you follow Duke basketball you know that Kyrie Irving missed all but 11 games this year because of a toe injury. He was dynamic when he played, making Duke a team many thought could go undefeated for the season. After his injury in the eighth game of the season, everything changed for Duke. Kyrie came back for the last three games, but it just wasn't the same. Many felt that he came back too early from his injury, risking his chance at being drafted this year. As a Duke fan, I wanted him back to help my team have a better chance at another championship. Now I think about it, and my opinion changes. I say good for him. If I were his father, I'd tell him to go to the pros and get paid as soon as he can. If my son or daughter is good enough to play professionally at any sport, I'm not going to rush them, but if there is a chance to make a career out of it, do it now. Irving's injury this year showed just how fragile the opportunity we all hold in life is. What if he came back to Duke, reinjured his toe, and never made it to the NBA? Yes, there are insurance policies to protect him, but that's not the same. Kyrie has the chance to make MILLIONS this year, and he is smart not to pass that up. Most people go to college in order to get a good job right? Well, what if your kid went to college to be an accountant and after his/her second year, the biggest accounting firm in the state offered a HIGHLY paying position that was very secure? What's the point of those other two years of college really? There is no guarantee that the job will be there after two more years in college, grab the opportunity while it's in front of you I say.
A TV show makes my point!
   That's right, I'm going to point out Doogie Howser M.D.! Just because Doogie was a kid didn't make him any less qualified to be a doctor! I know you laugh at this example, but it's the truth. If my kid is brilliant and can go to college and medical school when they should be in junior high, who am I to hold them back. That's the same for Kyrie Irving's parents. Just because he's only completed one year of college doesn't mean he's not qualified to play in the NBA! So, I say, good for you Kyrie!
You just broke my heart that's all!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Hiatus nearing completion!

Feeling a little better!
So, as I have mentioned recently my health hasn't been the best over the last few months, and it was making it hard for me to be a full-blown blogger. I haven't posted anything in quite a while now, but alas, the hiatus is almost over. 
I think the biggest thing is my medicine combination is starting to take hold for me. On top of that, I've started taking a multi-vitamin that seems to be helping with my energy levels. Plus, it's starting to get a little warmer out. That is until I look at the weather report for the rest of the week. Just like I said here, winter doesn't ever seem to end around here. However, I'm getting close.

I'm not making any promises!
 While it is true that I am feeling better, I can't guarantee that it will last. My ailments still have yet to be fully diagnosed(although my blood work doesn't show anything, my doc suspects RA.) However, I am going to do my best to feel better and get up and read and write blogs.
I hope all is great with you and that you're looking forward to Spring as much as I am!

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

When I was young...

                                         I had tried to cut my own hair!
                                                               What a dufus huh???

A long time ago, in a galaxy not so far away!
When I was young I used to go outside without an agenda, and always find something to do. Today, kids have to have planned activities or else they stand around like statues.

When I was young I did exactly what my parents said, or I paid the price. Today, kids have no sense of discipline and go so far as to question their parents.

When I was young I could run all day long really fast without getting tired. Today, can't even go fast asleep yet alone running!

When I was young Saturday morning cartoons were AWESOME! Today, not so much.

When I was young I would dream about someday becoming a high school teacher and coach. Today, I still do the same thing.

When I was young I could play golf all day while walking the course. Today, I have a hard time getting through 18 holes riding in a cart without being exhausted.

When I was young the world was still huge. Today, I can talk to anyone anywhere in the world due to this internet thing.

When I was young things were simple. Today, things are so hard. And, I'm not talking about just me. I'm talking about the entire world. It's hard to get by anymore for all of us.

                                                         This is me and not my son today!

When I was young I used to think it would be so cool to be a grown-up and be able to make all the decisions. Today, I think it would be so cool to be a kid and not have to decide anything. Ever!

When I was young athletes and Hollywood stars seemed so great. Today, all I see is overpaid, whyney, spoiled brats. Great role models for today's youth huh?

When I was young high school kids seemed so old and wise. Today, high school kids seem like babies although they are way more intelligent than my age group was as high school kids.

When I was young my health was never an issue, for the most part. Today, I think about my health EVERY day.

When I was young 30 was ancient. Today, 30 would be a good age to go BACK to!

When I was young I thought "Star Wars" was possible. Today, well maybe it is how do we really know???

When I was young I thought that someday I would be the coolest Dad ever. Today, I don't care about being cool, only keeping my kids happy, healthy and safe.

When I was young newspapers were actually paper. Today, it's just foolish to spend $1 every day on the paper when you can hop on the internet and read every paper in the world. Even though I still love the feel of the paper in my hands.

When I was young I was sure I would play pro football or pro baseball some day. If not both. Today, I wonder what the heck I was thinking. I'm short, white and not that athletic. And that was in my prime!

When I was young I thought my dad was literally Superman. Today, I worry that he's going to be gone too soon.

When I was young a hug from either of my Grandmothers was heartwarming. Today, I miss them both dearly.

When I was young my whole life rode on how the teams I root for did in their latest game. Today, well not my whole life at least. I do have kids and a wife that mean more to me.

When I was young I thought that if a Dad stayed home all the time with his kids there must be something wrong with him. Today, well I guess I was wrong huh?

                                                         Notice the shirt says "All-Stars."

Monday, February 28, 2011


So, I have not been writing at all for over a week now, and there is a huge reason. I have mentioned numerous times that I seem to have some sort of condition that is causing me pain. Well, over the last ten days or so, that pain has been overwhelming me. More importantly, it is causing me to be exhausted at times. And by at times, I mean almost always. I literally have no energy or motivation to write, read, or even get up out of my chair. It makes it kind of hard to be a proper SAHD, not to mention take care of another child. My parenting, homemaker tasks have been lacking for a while now. It really sucks.
What to do???
I have been pondering this exact question for a few days now, and I really just don't know. I see a doctor that doesn't believe I have anything autoimmune related(even though I have had an AI illness in my past, and my mother also suffers from one) and he doesn't believe I need to see a specialist. However, he has yet to tell me what he thinks is going on with me. My pain is real, and it's almost everywhere in my body. My hands, wrists, fingers, elbows, shoulders, hips, knees, ankles, feet, toes, back, neck, you name it, it hurts. The doc has given me a higher level pain medication, but I don't really want to be just given pain meds to get by on. I want to find out what I have, and get on the road to recovery. I'm really kind of pissed at this doctor. The problem is, he is very understanding to my lack of insurance, as many doctors would not be. Luckily, my wife has been promoted to full-time at her work, and I will have insurance within two weeks! So, maybe that will help. The thing is, I hate being so inmobile. I want to get up and do stuff. I miss playing basketball so much. I said a while back in this post that I wanted to get back into shape, and I said in this post that I wanted to go to a fantasy camp, well I can't do either being in this much pain. I can't play with my kids, I can't take care of my family like I want to, I can't make myself appreciate the opportunity that I have in being able to stay at home with my kids. It really sucks.
Not that bad!
Ok, while this may seem like a really huge pity party for me, make no mistake, I realize just how lucky I am. I may have days of pain that prevent me from moving much, and I may not get to play with my kids like I want, but I know there are people out there way worse off than me. I don't have cancer(at least I hope not) or some other equally horrible disease, and I don't think I'm dieing, so I can overcome this. I just need to get a doctor to find out what's wrong with me, and get me on the road to recovery. In the meantime, I have to just find a way to suck it up and give it all I can on each and every day. It really sucks.
My awesome blogs.
In the meantime, while I'm trying to get better, you will have to make due with my awesome blog posts when I can find the motivation and energy to do them. I know that sometimes you have a hard time getting through your own day without my incredible rants on some random subject related to parenting, but fear not: I will be back at full strength. I just don't know when. It really sucks!