Sydney & Denny

Sydney & Denny
September at the Park

Monday, November 29, 2010

Regrets.

We all have them!
With the recent passing of Thanksgiving I'm sure we have all taken time to think about what it is that we are thankful for. That's what the holiday is for of course. It is just too bad that we don't take the time to be thankful for what we have every day. The fact is, most of us don't take that time. I believe that I'm starting to, and maybe it comes with being a little older, but I think I realize that I have it pretty good in life. And not just on Thanksgiving.
What Thanksgiving has made me stop and think about are the regrets that I have in life. Yes, I have regrets. And I have a lot of them. I don't think anyone would be human if they didn't have things from their past that they didn't regret. I don't think that there are things that I HAVE done that I regret, but rather the things I regret are things I HAVE NOT done. Taking chances and putting myself on the line is the sort of thing where I've fallen short in my life. That is what I regret. Now don't get me wrong, I've said it all along that I would not change anything from my past because it has led me to here. I've got the family I always dreamed of. It's just that I regret not taking care of things earlier in life that could have made things easier for my family today. The biggest example I can give is the fact that I do not have a college degree. Well, you can get technical and say that I do have a degree. I have an Associates Degree, but as many of you know, that doesn't get you much in life. You need at least a Bachelor's Degree. Especially to do what I've always dreamed of doing. Teaching.
So, I regret not having the drive or ambition to finish my degree when I have had a number of opportunities to do so. I've always been afraid of something, I'm not sure what, and it has held me back.
How does it affect me as a SAHD?
Well, I'm really glad you asked that. I consider myself to be a fairly intelligent person, and that makes me able to see the error of my ways. It also makes me able to help my kids as they grow up. I can teach them how to live life without regrets. At least not the type of regret that I have. I can teach them to go for things, to put themselves out there. I can teach them that it's okay to be afraid, but not to let that fear paralyze you. I can also teach them that It's never too late to fix old regrets. I can do that by finding a way to get back into school and finish the degree that I have always dreamed of having. If I can show them it will go a lot father than just telling them. That is one of my new goals in life. To get my college degree so that I can tell my kids that it's never too late to chase your dreams.
Life can change in an instant.
A lot of this thankfulness and regret thinking has been brought on by the recent holiday. However, a lot has been brought on by an article in Sports Illustrated that I read recently. In the November 29, 2010 issue there is an article about a young lady that really touched me. I put a link to it here in case you wanted to check it out. It was written by Chris Ballard about Jill Costello, a coxswain for the Cal crew team. I really know nothing about crew other than they row a boat. So, next to nothing. Well this young lady eventually passed away from lung cancer even though she had never smoked in her life. It started with some abdominal discomfort and then just got worse from there.  "Jill had gone from being a carefree college student to being told she probably had nine months to live." Well reading this just made me really realize even more fully that we are here for such a short time, and it can be taken from us in an instant. It made me go back to the issue of regret. I don't want to be told tomorrow that I have nine months to live and know that I never gave my full effort to accomplishing the things I've always wanted to in life. More importantly, I want my kids to not have any real regrets. I want them to live life without fear of regret. I want them to be happy and know that they always gave their best effort at what they are trying to do.
Now, with all of this being said, I want to make clear that I am thankful for all that I have in life and hope that you are too.
Have a great day and live life without regrets today!

2 comments:

  1. As parents we always want life for our kids to be better than it was for us. I tell my kids that a college degree isn't really worth much if they aren't planning on being an employee or to do something that requires a doctorate and research grants. I never used my degree. My wife has a law degree and she never used her's either. She wound up getting a professional certification as a construction project manager and used that instead. Go figure. Anyway, I have a few of those same sorts of regrets that you have. But, you're right, on a whole we have a lot to be thankful for every day.

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  2. I always say that life is a balance between thinking you may get hit by a bus tomorrow or living to be 100. I try to land in the middle:)

    Have fun!

    Al

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